I have to keep reminding myself of my unhealthy relationship with food. I haven’t been great about my new rules.
On Friday, some co-workers were getting together to go out for food and beer. I was invited, and social occasions are allowed per my self-imposed rules. The fact I had an overly-large lunch earlier wasn’t good, but whatever.
I had a beer called “Morning Wood”, and I even shared my “Morning Wood”. I made a (probably annoying) comment about the bike rack being free when others were complaining about parking meters.
I slept in Saturday. I went out for a ride with Tim. I got about 23 miles in. I ate leftover split-pea soup. I hadn’t gone grocery shopping. I really wanted to go out for food and beer. I successfully suppressed those urges.
I got up early today, Sunday, to meet Tim, Patrick, and Asher for a ride today. I left before sunrise in the cold air. It was a good ride, mostly urban. Nothing epic, just four guys riding around. I did have some snacks at coffee shops, but nothing extreme. I ended the day with over 46 miles.
Again, later in the day I was really wanting to go out for food and beer. I still haven’t gone grocery shopping. I’m cooking a simple peas and rice dish that I actually have the stuff to make. I’m not going back out, because if I do, I’ll find myself gorged on food and sloshing full of beer.
I’m slightly depressed because I know I shouldn’t go out to eat and drink. Adding to that is the fact that I don’t like the way I feel about it. I didn’t have this much trouble controlling my eating and drinking three and four years ago. Why now?
I am killing time and forgetting about food for a while by burying myself in reading. I’m currently reading Spin, which I highly recommend, at least if you’re into science fiction.