Category Archives: Relationships

Bad Day, Nice Ride

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The workday was stressful.  The only thing that made it tolerable was the pleasant bicycle commute bracketing it.

The day improved greatly once I arrived home.  Diane was there and had prepared a meal.  It was nothing fancy, but it was tasty and ready when I walked in the door.

The weather forecast has been threatening rain, but I lucked out again, and only had a few sprinkles on the way home.  The skies cleared after dinner, so Diane and I left on a bike ride.

She wanted to see my commute route, so we rode to my workplace.  From there, we turned east and rode to the Big Four Bridge.  She didn’t want to ride on the bridge due to the pedestrians, but we locked up the bikes and walked across.

Resting At the Big Four Bridge

Resting At the Big Four Bridge

After walking back to the Kentucky side of the bridge, we got back on the bikes and rode to Louisville Beer Store and each drank a beer out on the patio.  There were a lot of cyclists there.  I only recognized one of them.

View from the bridge

View from the bridge

We left there as it was getting dark.  We were well-lit and taking city streets.  There was a thunderstorm in the distance, but we never got rained on.  We made another stop at a convenience store for a couple of six-packs of beer before heading home.

On the bridge

On the bridge

Once home, Diane took a soak in the tub.  Her legs needed it.  We rode nine miles together.  That’s her longest ride yet.  I’m still hoping she’ll ride next Wednesday’s Ride of Silence.

She doesn’t like wearing a helmet.  I’ve been wearing mine less now that the weather has warmed up.  I bought a glasses-mounted mirror so I can still see behind me.  Today was another helmet-free day.

Lifestyle Change… Again

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I had a few of huge lifestyle changes over the last few years.  The diet and exercise that began in late 2007, the bicycling in 2008, and the car-free lifestyle that went into full-force in 2011 are all a big part of it.  There were also relationship changes.  It’s the relationship changes that are sparking things now.

Diane

Let me be blunt.  I love Diane.  She’s not living with me, but her dog has been at my house for a few days.  I bought her a phone and put her on my family plan.  We bought a TV together, and I’m no longer TV-free.  We’ll get by with broadcast TV and an antenna.

Yes, There's a TV in my livingroom now

Yes, There’s a TV in my livingroom now

This is at least a long-term relationship and possibly more.  I bought her a plane ticket to join me on my trip to San Francisco in July.  We’re making long-term plans.  I fully expect that we’ll live together this year.

She has a dog, Baxter, and a cat, Fancy.  Fancy hasn’t been over yet, but Baxter has been here all weekend.

Baxter after a bath

Baxter after a bath

Diane doesn’t like dog hair, so we’ve both been cleaning.  I also bathed both of my dogs and brushed them out while she was out running errands.  Once the wet dog smell aired out, the house smelled better than it has in a while.

Sandy does not like getting a bath

Sandy does not like getting a bath

You won’t see her on social media.  She doesn’t use Facebook or Google+.  She rarely touches a computer.  She says I post enough for the both of us.

I mentioned that her first bike ride in years was a 7-mile night ride in traffic.  I think she has the capability to be more of a cyclist than I am.  I don’t know if she has the desire.  I’ll find out more later.

Work

I’ve been trying to focus a little more at work to avoid getting too complacent.  That involved going in a 3:00am on Thursday to get a major project completed without disrupting things during business hours.

I’m still a bike commuter, and the ride into work was easy.  The traffic was very light, although the bars were still open, and I was a bit worried about drunk drivers.

Quiet commute in the bike lane

Quiet commute in the bike lane

Money

Diane is used to being more frugal than I am.  She’s tolerating my $15 per pound coffee, but she’s insisting on cheaper grocery shopping and eating at home.  She has done much of the cooking, so I’m not complaining.

Diane is still willing to go out on occasion.  We’ve gone out for good beer at Apocalypse Brew Works on my birthday (by bicycle!), and Four Pegs last Thursday (on foot).  I did grab a picture of her on the walk home from Four Pegs.

The sign seemed fitting

The sign seemed fitting

Events

It’s nice to go out and do things again.  We walked around during the Balloon Glimmer (as part of the Kentucky Derby Festival).

Balloon Glimmer

Balloon Glimmer

We watched the Great Steamboat Race – and had a few drinks and some food.

Exercise

This is the interesting point.  Diane wants to lose weight.  She’s in relatively good health.  The only thing preventing us from doing more exercise together is time.  She likes to ride a bike, but doesn’t own one yet.  Between both of our jobs, and her youngest child who sometimes spends time with her, time can be tight.

We’ll eventually buy her a hybrid bike of some sort, but she may turn out to want a road bike some day.  I think her power to weight ratio could be much better than mine.  She’s only 5’1″.

The hit on my cycling

At this point, I’m riding a bike less, and I’m not worried.  I still get around (alone) by bike.  Diane rides occasionally and I hope she starts to ride more.  She’ll continue to drive her car for transportation.

I did a lot of thinking about what’s important in life.  Long rides every weekend didn’t rank that high.  I can do it less often.

Overall, I’m happy with life right now.  Some of that is new love.  Some of it is the anti-depressant I’m taking.  I’m not complaining.

Camping With Diane

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Diane and I had planned to camp on Saturday and Sunday night at Clifty Falls State Park in Indiana.  The weather Saturday wasn’t good, so we decided to limit it to Sunday.

This was a car-camping trip, not a bicycle trip.  I’m hoping Diane will be willing and able to do overnight bike trips next year.

When we arrived Sunday afternoon most of the campsites were quite soggy with flooded fire rings.  We found one that was reasonably dry (but still muddy) and set up the tent.

We then went for a hike on one of the trails.

Diane on the trail

Diane on the trail

Some of the trail was quite muddy and slippery.  I’m glad we both wore old shoes.  Diane slipped once and got a bit muddy, but didn’t hurt herself.

Hanging around at camp

Hanging around at camp

We cooked sausage over the campfire.  I warmed baked beans on my Esbit camp stove.  We had a small amount of beer and wine.

Near the falls

Near the falls

We stayed up late, but weren’t able to see any stars due to the overcast skies.  My new tent is a tad small for both of us, but it worked.  The single narrow air mattress was a problem, and we swapped places, one on the ground, one on the mattress, throughout the night.  We’ll buy another sleeping bag with air mattress in the future.  Then we can both be comfortable.  We’ll probably buy a bigger tent also.

I slept as I normally do while camping, poorly.  Overnight rain made some noise on the rain fly, but we stayed dry.  I was comfortable, but Diane said she was cold.

In the morning we re-started the fire for warmth and started coffee and oatmeal on the Esbit stoves.

Breakfast time

Breakfast time

The campground has showers and nice toilets.  We were able to shower and prepare for a day back in civilization.  We packed up and headed back to town.

Even without the bike this was a lot of fun.  We talked about bringing bikes to ride around the park, but this time we were hiking, and that would have been problematic with the bikes.

 

Shifting Priorities

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If you’ve been paying any attention whatsoever, it’s apparent that I’m in a relationship again.  Things are going well with Diane.  I bought her a new cell phone yesterday, and put her on my plan.

Diane is not living with me, but that will probably change in the near future.  I will remain car-free, but she will keep her car.  It’s paid off, but needs a little work.

My lifestyle will be going through some pretty big changes.  I have a variety of things I need to spend money on.  The plans for swapping handlebars on my bikes (or any other major expense) are on hold.  This seems to be working well as my neck issue has abated a bit, and I can ride any of my bikes again.  I rode the rSogn to work today.

Diane wants to fly to San Francisco with me this summer.  That will mean we need some extra money for spending and her flight.  I hope we can book her flight in the next few weeks.

Diane remains a good influence in my life.  She (nicely) reminds me not to overeat or drink too much.  She still enjoys an occasional drink with me.

Not everything is perfect.  As we’ve spent a lot of time together recently, we’ve discovered some of each other’s insecurities and personality flaws.  I don’t believe any of it’s a real problem, just a challenge to overcome.

I read something years ago about “being the perfect partner” rather than “looking for the perfect partner”.  That’s what I’m working on.  In the short-term, that means keeping my life in order from housework to eating habits.

Life continues to be a strange adventure.

Short, but Wonderful, Birthday Ride

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I originally had plans for a 42-mile birthday bike ride yesterday – one mile for each trip around the sun.  Other things came up in the morning, and that didn’t happen.

Diane did buy me a few gifts and baked a German Chocolate cake for my birthday.  I borrowed my daughter’s bike and Diane and I rode seven miles to Apocalypse Brew Works and back.  The bike was a bit big for her, but she did well for her first time on a bike in a few years.  She handled traffic like a champ.  She had to walk a hill, but will probably manage it next time once she gets better about shifting.  She had a positive attitude the whole time.  She’s a wonderful, happy, woman, and I love her.

Look at that smile!

Look at that smile!

She was a little more tired on the return trip, but still was happy and good-natured.

Smiling on the return trip

Smiling on the return trip

The trip was made euro-style.  We didn’t wear bike-specific clothing or helmets.  He carried some luggage, and I hauled a growler home full of beer.

Tonight’s plans have changed.  We were going to go camping, but the weather’s not looking good.  We’re going to wait until tomorrow night.

A Good Influence

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Diane is a good influence on me.  She’s more about home-cooking and less drinking.  She enjoys helping me cook (or me helping her…)  I’m buying beer at the store, but I’m only having one or two a day.  I’m saving money by not going to the bar.

Her daughter and mother came over for a cookout over the weekend.  It was enjoyable.

Some people have commented that we are “moving too fast”.  Well, we’re not living together, just spending a lot of time together.

If things do get more serious, my life will go through a few adjustments:

  • We’ll have a TV.  She’s not going to live without one, and I can handle it if we’re using internet-based shows and OTA broadcasts instead of paying for cable.
  • She’ll keep her car.  I’ll continue to get around by bike, but have a car available when needed.
  • She’s financially frugal.  I’ve spent the last few years spending too much money on bikes, bars, restaurants, and coffee.  I’ll need to adjust my budget and my habits.  I’ve already started on this.
  • She wants to lose weight and get healthier.  This will involve more walking.  She seems to have some interest in riding a bike too.

I played volleyball Monday, and Diane attended, mostly just to watch.  She was sitting up on the deck, wearing sunglasses and watching us play.  Then I remembered seeing her last year.  I didn’t know her then, and don’t remember talking to her, but we had at least seen each other before.

We’re planning on going camping this weekend.  It could be interesting with cool overnight temperatures and a chance of rain.  I’ll try to take pictures.

Whatta Week!

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Okay, it’s only Thursday, but this has been a busy week already.

On Monday, my daughter, Dawn, married Guthrie.  I present Mr. and Mrs. Smith:

Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Mr. and Mrs. Smith

It was a simple wedding.  There was a dinner afterward.

Later in the evening I went to play volleyball.  I’ve been using a dating site to try and meet women with mixed results.  While at volleyball, a woman approached me and we talked.  We had a date on Tuesday.  Her name is Diane.

I had a date with Renee that I thought went well last week.  She told me that she didn’t think we should have a second date a couple of days ago.

Yesterday was a housecleaning day.  I’ve been trying to keep my life more in order.  The anti-depressant seems to be working.  My moods have been more level.  I’ve been drinking less.  I’m not “stress eating”.  I have more motivation to do simple things – but not enough to do great things.  Hmmm.

I had a date scheduled with Melissa today, but she never called or showed up.  So I sat and ate pizza and had a beer by myself.  I wasn’t really bothered much by it.

I have a second date with Diane tomorrow.  It’s odd that the only second date I’m getting out of this is from a woman that I didn’t meet online.  We have a few friends and acquaintances in common – mostly through the Louisville Ski Club, of which I’m a member.

I’ve ridden the bike to work every day this week.  I’ve ridden the bike everywhere.  I haven’t missed work.  I’ve done some cooking at home.  I’ve been keeping the house clean.  I have a second date tomorrow.  This is progress.

Homebody Weekend?

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I had hoped to get out and get some mileage in this weekend.  That didn’t happen.

I was up late Friday after my date with Renee.  I slept in on Saturday, and once I was up mowed the lawn for the first time this year.  I also went grocery shopping and picked up dog food.

Big Dummy Loaded

Big Dummy Loaded

Cindy, my first ex-wife, took a bus from Michigan down for my daughters wedding.  The wedding is tomorrow (Monday).  I met up with Cindy for about 10 minutes at my daughter’s apartment.  I hadn’t seen her in a couple of years.  Cindy owns a truck, but she didn’t trust it to make it here, so she’s “enjoying” the car-free lifestyle while she’s here.  :D

I have another date lined up on Thursday.  This one is with Melissa.  I know little about her.  I think I’ll see Renee again on Friday.  There are a few other possibilities coming up too.  This dating thing is kind of bizarre for me, especially when I’m trying to keep track of the “who and when”.  I’m bad with names.  Luckily, I take notes and use Google Calendar.

Something In The Air?

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I’ve experienced a bizarre set of emotions over the last few days.  My depression had lifted quite a bit this week.  Wednesday after work, I signed back up on a dating site.

I had a Thursday doctor appointment that basically meant I would go to work for three hours.  I woke up Thursday morning with quite a headache, and stayed home from work.  I enjoyed listening to the thunderstorm while laying in bed, even if it did bring a cold front along with it.

The storm had ended and the rain had mostly stopped when I headed out for my doctor appointment.  The office allows me to bring the bike inside, so I didn’t have to deal with the lack of bike parking.

This was mostly a follow-up visit for lifelong issue that I have.  I also brought up the depression again, and the fact that I’ve cut my beer consumption way down (he’s chastised me about this before).

Despite years of refusing a chemical solution to my depression, I finally agreed to try it.  He wrote a prescription.  It’ll take a few weeks to determine if it’s going to work out for me.

I was at the office for a couple of hours.  There was a paperwork snafu, and they were busy.  When I did leave, it was pouring rain, and I headed up Eastern Parkway to the pharmacy.  Tim passed me going the other way (in his car).  He was driving home from work.  Heh.  I was proud to be getting wet wearing my jeans and t-shirt.

After drinking one cup of coffee and going back to the pharmacy, I rode home.  I spent the remainder of the day cleaning the house and talking to several women on the phone that had responded to me on the dating site.  This was a much better response than I got last time.  Was it because it’s a different site?  My different approach?  Because Spring is in the air?

I had a few good conversations, but the best was with Renee.  She was also the one who could set aside some time for a Friday evening date.  I met her Friday at 7:00pm (less than 7 hours ago) at Four Pegs.  She doesn’t drink, so she had water and the famous Chicken Waffle sandwich.  I had a burger, water, and a single beer.  We spent the evening together, and I got to know a lot about her.

She eventually went home.  That saying, “parting is such sweet sorrow”, yeah.  I didn’t expect to be affected that way.  I hope to see her again.  At best, it’ll probably be another week.  She’s smart, funny, sarcastic, and cuddly.  She has a young daughter, which means I need to make some big decisions about my life if I continue down this path.

It’s now almost 2:00am.  I plan to get out on the bike tomorrow, but I won’t be getting up early to do that.

I Don’t Feel Like a Cyclist Anymore

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Even after closing my dating site account, I’ve been fixated on relationships.  It’s not been healthy for me.  It’s time to move on.  I need to enjoy the good points of being single.

Another issue is bike riding.  I haven’t been doing much.  I’m also mostly limited to the recumbent due to neck pain.

I spent a lot of money building up the rSogn for long rides, but now I can’t ride it on anything other than a short ride.  I’m sticking to the rule that I won’t buy a new bike in 2013.  I also won’t sell any existing bikes.  Unless my neck improves, I’ll mostly be riding the recumbent.  I may end up putting some bikes up for sale in 2014.  Then I could expand the recumbent fleet.

I’ve had one ride this year where I felt strong.  I felt like a cyclist.  Other than that, even my longer rides feel slow and plodding.  Slow and plodding is fine for going to work or the grocery store, but I want to do more than that.  That means I need to train.

I put off training once before because I was having knee pain on the recumbent.  I’ve solved that issue.  I adjusted the seat.  A recumbent has a seat that slides forward and back – similar to the seat in a car.  Unlike a regular bicycle saddle, gaining or losing weight can quickly affect proper saddle position.  My weight gain meant my seat needed to be moved back.  Since moving it, I’ve had less knee pain.

I’ve also mentioned that the recumbent needs some work.  I keep putting it off.  I need to get around to doing it.  It could also use a few upgrades.

Dating Sucks

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I signed up for a dating site.  Date #1 was a no-show.  Date #2 didn’t seem interested.  Date #3 was fascinating, but eventually it was obvious she wasn’t interested.

There was a #4, but we never set up a date.  We had some nice email conversations.  I don’t know if she lost interest or is just too busy.

What I discovered is that:

  • It’s an emotional roller-coaster
  • I need to stay true to myself
  • Looking for someone is the best way to never find them

It was hard for me to be happy while actively seeking someone.  I was willing to give up my car-free, tv-free lifestyle.  I think I was going about it all wrong.

I’ve closed my dating site accounts.  I’m going to remain car-free and tv-free, not because of any “greater calling”, but because that’s what I want.

A friend told me to “be true to yourself”.  I will.  I’m going to live my life.  Maybe I’ll find someone to share it, maybe I won’t  Either way, I can be happy being me.

Not dating means I’m more productive and less stressed.  So be it.

 

Would You Date a Sweaty Bike-Riding Guy With No Car?

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I mentioned I had a date tonight.  ”L” and I were to meet in Okolona – a southern part of Louisville.

The trip there was interesting.  I rode my rSogn to work this morning, because it’ll fit on a bus rack.  I intended to hop the 18 bus down there after work and ride back.  Preston Highway during rush hour doesn’t appeal to me.

When the 18 arrived, it already had two bikes on front, and the bus was pretty crowded.  Oh well. Off I go, wearing my work clothes.

I took the lane all the way down Preston Highway, almost to Outer Loop.  How many rude or dangerous drivers? Zero.  It was actually quite nice.  Traffic was heavy, but people were courteously changing lanes to pass.

I made better time than the 18 bus for most of the trip.  It passed me near Fern Valley Rd, and it still had those two bikes on the front.

On the return trip I came right back up Preston Highway, again, no issues.  There was lighter traffic, but it was moving faster.  I was well lit – three tailights, dyno-headlight, and a reflective vest.  Two LMPD officers passed me without even looking twice.

The date itself didn’t seem to go well. At least the 23-mile bike ride was nice.

Food, Dating, and a Lazy Weekend

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I mentioned a while ago that I joined a dating site.  I haven’t actually had a date yet.  I had one (let’s call her T) that stood me up – probably for valid reasons.  There were two more who weren’t interested once they found out I don’t own a car.  Never mind that I don’t need them to run me around.  I’m quite self-sufficient.

There are still two more, M and L.  M is fascinating.  She’s also found this blog, so of course I’ll say good things about her.   :D  I haven’t met her in person, so who knows what first impressions we’ll have with each other.  L is less interesting, but I’m supposed to meet her tomorrow evening.  She doesn’t know I don’t have a car yet.  We’ll see how that turns out.  I’ll be taking a bus to meet her.

I spent most of the weekend in the house.  Tim, Timothy, and Patrick headed out yesterday for a camping trip and gravel ride..  I didn’t go.  My ongoing neck issue meant no gravel riding.  Although they were quite cold, I’m still jealous.

I wanted to go to Four Pegs for food and beer today.  I still had a lot of housework to do today.  I negotiated with myself.  If I did the dishes, I could go to Four Pegs, so I did the dishes.  I walked to Four Pegs – I haven’t been on a bike since Friday.

I got into an interesting conversation with a woman bicyclist at Four Pegs.  Let’s call her Z.  Z is gay.  So, I’m out of the running.  However, she actively tried to set me up with her friend, D.  It was obvious D wasn’t interested.  Z didn’t give up.  It was really quite embarrassing.  That’s the first time that a stranger tried to “hook me up”.

Oh, and Z knows somebody in common with M… but I won’t get further into that, or somebody will figure something out and get weird… or not.  Louisville isn’t that big.

This dating thing kind of sucks.  Most people (including me) want somebody to have a connection with, to have a partner, to have someone to be affectionate with.  That’s the easy part.  It’s all the other stuff that makes it complicated.  Lifestyle, TV shows, cars, beer, music, physical activity, and just normal stuff like attitude, tone of voice, and body language.

Let’s not forget the weird dance we do.  I am looking for a long-term thing, but you don’t just go out and say, “Hey! You! – you’re attractive and seem nice, will you marry me?  What’s your name by the way?”  Some people already know each other before they get involved.  That’s they way Cindy (my first wife) and I were.  We knew each other since kindergarten.  That makes it a lot easier.

M likes email (as do I), which means we’ve had several long exchanges.  That also means they come once a day at best.  It takes a while to write it all.

L likes texting.  Very little is said in each text, but you can have many in a short period of time.

I really prefer one-on-one conversation, but I haven’t got there with any of them yet, except Z’s friend D, who cut it quite short.

I’m not sure I can handle trying to talk to strangers with the intent of finding “the one”.  I’ll continue for a while, but eventually I’ll give up and go back to not worrying about it.  Too bad I already paid Match.com for three months.

I’m Still Here!

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I’ve been lax about writing.  Instead, I fire off a sentence or two on Google+.  I’ve also been using Google+ less, which has helped my productivity, but I’ve had nearly no social life – even an online one.  I’ll be curtailing my G+ usage even more to spend the time having an in-person social life, writing here, and focusing on my health goals.

Beer is a problem.  Food is a bigger problem.  Both have been out of control for a while now.  Grocery store? What’s that?  Seriously, I need to buy groceries and cook again.  Yesterday (and too many other days) I went out for dinner and drank too much beer – way too much.  I woke up this morning after a crappy night’s sleep feeling sick and dehydrated.

I went out to eat after work today too.  It was either that or the grocery store, and I loathe the grocery store.  Also, I’d have to cook, which would mean washing the dishes….   Anyway, I had only two beers.  It was enough to enjoy my time, but I didn’t get drunk.  It was quite nice.  I’ll have to try this “not drunk” more often.

So less time on social media.  More time on dishes.

I’m riding the bike nearly every day.  I’ve got just over 600 miles in for the year.  This time of year isn’t conducive to really high miles, so I think I’m doing pretty good.  There’s a populaire this Sunday that I should force myself to ride.  62 miles + 24 to get there and back.  Pushing 90 miles?  Maybe I could go the long way and get an even 100 for the day.  I’ll probably ride the recumbent, as the rSogn will be having new rear wheel built that weekend.  I’ve never ridden 100 miles in a day on the ‘bent.

I’ve had some nice short-ish weekend rides with Tim.  Nothing epic, mostly just around town rides.  Sometimes we had multiple coffee stops.  Most of the RCCS crew has little free time.  They all have family obligations or whatnot.  Darn families.  They take away our freedom.

I’ve complained a little (maybe more than a little) about loneliness.  Well, I went and joined a dating site, again.  I’ll try not to marry the first woman I meet within six months this time around.  I texted with one woman late into the night on Sunday.  I was limiting my looking to local women… really local, because I don’t own a car.  Unfortunately, her profile said she was five miles away, in reality she had moved to another town 40 miles away.  We still planned a Monday night date here in Louisville.  She stood me up.  She did contact me later.  She had car trouble.  I haven’t heard from her since.  I’m not going to pester her.  We’ll see if I have better luck (and hopefully someone closer) next time.

Icing on the cake?  My daughter and I had plans to go out on Tuesday night.  Guess what?  She stood me up too.  She fell asleep and didn’t hear her phone.  Oh well.  I’ve spent most of my dining out time alone.  Often I’m surrounded by people, yet I’m alone.  I’m not an extrovert.  It’s difficult for me to just start talking to people, and honestly, some of them don’t want me to talk to them.

I’m a great procrastinator.  I wish I could get paid for that.  I’d easily get that job.  ”Senior Vice President of Procrastination”  Yep.  I could do it.  I put off posting here.  I’ve put off my upper-body exercises.  I’ve put off getting my diet back under control.  I should take advantage of my good mood tonight and do something useful, but I won’t.  I’m procrastinating again…… Oh wait!  I’m posting here.  That counts, right?

I’m dreading the March 1 weigh-in.  Unless I starve myself until then (which I won’t do), I’ve probably gained a tad.  Bleh.

It’s past my bed time.  Good night!

Holidays

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I’ve never been big on gifts for Christmas.  I have (now grown) children, so it was necessary to buy stuff before, but it was limited to immediate family.

I did buy a couple of things for an online acquaintance recently.  I also received a bag of really good coffee in the mail.

I don’t mind gifts.  I mind the expectation of gifts.

I’m not close to my daughters anymore.  Even the youngest, who lives nearby, rarely calls.  Her phone is currently shut off and I never know when she’s home.  I haven’t spoken with her in a while.

I’ll be spending another holiday alone.  I still have my dogs.

It’s not all bad though.  I’m planning a 75-mile solo bike ride tomorrow.  I’ll do a shorter group ride on Monday.  I haven’t figured out Christmas day yet.  It just seems a waste to have a four-day break from work and not do something.

It’s times like this that I’m reminded of the downsides of being single.  However, taking off on a bike ride for 8+ hours without much planning ahead is difficult in most relationships.  Maybe being single is okay.  I don’t have to justify my habits at home, rather it’s being gone for bike rides, or peeing in the shower.

Life is Crazy

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I haven’t posted in a while, but things have been happening.

Depression
I’ve been suffering on and off with depression a fair amount again.  I’m still on the fence about what to do about it. If I can make enough changes to ease things, great.  Otherwise, I may turn to professional help.

Houseboat Trip
Robin and I went on the houseboat trip.  It was four days of fun, sun, a storm, alcohol, and cool people.

New Bike
I gave the new-ish hybrid bike to Dawn.  She needs a bike for transportation.  I didn’t have a use for it.  I had bought it as a gravel bike, then decided to go with a Salsa Fargo instead.

Newer Bike 
I have the Fargo.  I’ve ridden it to work a few times, and around town for fun.  I took it on some trails today, and realized that I still suck at mountain biking.  :)

Robin
I decided I needed to end my relationship with Robin.  I need to get my head out of my ass and figure out my life.  She didn’t do anything wrong.  I’m not pointing fingers.  I just wasn’t behaving myself with proper lifestyle choices while around her.  That’s my fault, but it needed to stop.  :(

Gravel Grovel
I’m still planning on racing Gravel Grovel this year, but I haven’t registered yet.  I went for a ride today, and at only 18.5 miles, I was beat.  My fitness level has really deteriorated.  I’m going to have to make a concerted effort to fix this quickly.  I’ve only got a little over two months.

Canoe Comedy

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I’m a member of the Louisville Ski Club.  My volleyball league is part of that.  Yesterday was the annual canoe trip.

I had last been in a canoe in April 2010 on my North Carolina vacation.  It was on the New River near Boone, NC, and was pretty sedate.  The biggest hazards were minor rapids over rocky shallow spots.  We kept the canoe upright and it was fun, possibly even a bit boring.

Yesterday’s trip was a 12-mile trip on Elkhorn Creek near Frankfort KY.  This trip has been scheduled for months, and with the drought we were wondering if the creek would be passable.  The recent rains over the last few weeks solved that.  The creek was fairly high and running swiftly.

The trip was from Canoe Kentucky.  They had a macaw with quite a personality.

You lookin' at me?

You lookin’ at me?

I had brought a ziplock bag with me to keep my phone and other stuff in.  It worked well enough last time, and I didn’t plan on getting wet.  The store sold small waterproof boxes.  One that would fit my phone was $12.  That turned out to be a wise investment.

They bused us six miles upstream, so the halfway point would be back at Canoe Kentucky.  This allows a 12-mile ride on Elkhorn Creek without having to worry about the dam in Frankfort, or where the creek ends at the Kentucky River.

Neither Robin or I are expert canoeists.  She’s been out more than me, so she was captain, at the rear of the boat.

Canoes on Elkhorn Creek

Canoes on Elkhorn Creek

There were 22 of us on the trip from the Ski Club.  I think it was ten canoes and two kayaks.

Once the water got rough, my phone was safely locked in the box, and I didn’t take more pictures until after the trip.

This was the couple we car-pooled with.

This was the couple we car-pooled with.

The water got rough where the creek got very shallow and rocky.  I’m not entirely sure how, but we ended up sideways and I fell out of the canoe.  The safety video tells you to fall upstream so the canoe doesn’t run you over.  I don’t know how they plan such things.  I, of course, was downstream from the canoe.

It was shallow water, but the current was strong.  I was unable to stand, and the canoe (with Robin still in it) was attempting to go over me.  The water was too shallow for that.  I grabbed the canoe, which had the unintended consequence of dumping Robin into the water with me.

The much lighter canoe then passed over us.  It, our paddles, cooler, drinks, snacks, and Robin’s life-vest continued downstream without us.  I was wearing my life vest, but the water was quite shallow.  We were able to stand up in the mid-calf deep water, but walking to shore wasn’t feasible.  I was already hurting from the rocks I had bounced against.

Robin insisted we float downstream.  I balked.  She took off without me and seemed to have no issues catching up with the group ahead that was gathering our stuff.

I allowed myself to float.  The rocks were painful, but only continued for a dozen feet for so before I was in deeper water.

The current didn’t quite take me the same direction as Robin.  She ended up on the right bank where others were.  The water wasn’t deep there.  I ended up heading toward the left bank, which was much deeper and had a large bushy tree hanging into the water.  It was dense enough to be impassible, and probably continued to far into the water to go under it.

As I approached the tree, I grabbed for a larger branch to support the force of the current.  I didn’t want to get pushed into the tree.  It was covered in thorns.  I was trying to figure out how to get myself out of the predicament, when a more skilled guy on a kayak made his way over and had me grab the front of his kayak, and he pulled me away from the tree and to shallower water.

Now we re-grouped.  We had retained most of our canned beverages.  The fried chicken was still sealed in it’s container.  Our phones were dry in their boxes.  Nothing was lost other than some of the beverages and all of our ice.  We were both beat up and had sore spots, but nothing major was bleeding.  We continued on.

There were many islands in the creek.  These narrower spots caused greater flow and issues with trees at the edge.  We had a number of close-calls and a few collisions.

We eventually made it to the halfway point, where I ran back to the car to grab our chips that were forgotten the first time.

Some of our crew, back at Canoe Kentucky - the halfway point

Some of our crew, back at Canoe Kentucky – the halfway point

We continued on.  I was half tempted to sit out the rest of the trip, but that would have left Robin without a canoe partner.

Some more in our group - turned around backwards - oops

Some more in our group – turned around backwards – oops

At some point we dumped a second time.  I don’t remember the details.  It was deep enough that I didn’t hit rocks.  We had our cooler bungied in this time, and lost nothing.

We approached a narrow spot.  There were too many canoes bunched up.  We backed off to let the group in front go first.  They had a few issues, but made it through.  We did not.  We ran directly into a tree at the water’s edge.  It was a hard impact and I slid off the seat on to the bottom of the canoe.  The front of the canoe went downward and we took in a bunch of water, swamping us, but we didn’t tip.  We managed to paddle (half sunk) to the other shore to empty out.  Before we got out of the canoe, another group came through and collided.  Multiple canoes hit us, but we were in very shallow water.  Once the group was past, we dumped the water and continued.  Somewhere in that mess I lost my towel, which was already soaking wet.  No big loss.

We came across another rough spot and tangled with a tree.  Me managed to lose one of our paddles.  We didn’t dump however.  Another couple of guys in our group (Dave and Pat) dumped and lost a paddle and a cooler.  We were fighting to regain control at the time, and continued our way downstream a bit.  We eventually got to shore where our paddle was returned to us.  I had Dave and Pat’s lost paddle.  We also grabbed their cooler.

We kept waiting for them to come downstream, but there was no sign of them.  I eventually walked upstream (luckily it was an easy climb up to a road in that spot) and found them.

Pat had lost his glasses.  Their canoe was trapped under a log.  The current was strong and I really didn’t think we’d get the canoe out.  The three of us were able to get the canoe free, which then led to us trying to control a sunken canoe in fast current.  We managed, and I gave them their missing paddle.  I walked back to our landing spot and we continued on.

It was pretty calm after that.  Our take-out spot was right after the US127 bridge.  We stopped just before the bridge where there was a nice place to eat and swim.  We talked with others in the group and enjoyed our snack.

After a bit, it was time to go.  Robin and I got back in the canoe and headed downstream.  The water was deep here.  It seemed the current was faster than it should have been.  We could see the take-out spot.  I complained that “of course the take out is in heavy current”. I had barely gotten that complaint out when, for no apparent reason, the canoe flipped, dumping us both in the water.

Robin wasn’t wearing her life vest (again).  I was wearing mine, but apparently it wasn’t tight enough, as it moved upward on me, cutting of my vision.  She struggled because her footwear – crocs (poor choice) slid up on her ankles, making it difficult to swim.  She was some distance from the canoe.  I was holding on to it.  Her life vest was right there in front of me.  I intended to throw it to her, but she had fastened it to the cooler, and I couldn’t get it free.

I saw one of my sandals floating (also a poor choice of footwear), and I threw it in the half-swamped canoe.  Robin was making progress toward the canoe.  We were both trying to get to the left bank, as that’s where the take-out was.

She reached the canoe, and we both swam toward shore, speeding up our glacial progress.  Amazingly, we made it to the take-out before getting carried downstream.

Robin lost her towel and a visor she had been wearing.  I (amazingly) still had both sandals.  We still had our phones and keys, and they were dry.

We were both grumpy and glad to be done with the trip.  Canoeing with someone can be stressful, much like tandem bike riding.

It also turned out to be more dangerous than I thought it would be.  On an average bike ride, I don’t crash, fall over, or collide with stationary objects.  We flipped three times and swamped the canoe once.  We collided with trees, other canoes, and one kayak (but the kayak wasn’t stationary, and it was her fault).

The two guys with the stuck canoe really scared me.  If that had been a person rather than a canoe, they would have died.  There really was no way out.

As far as the flip right at the end… The other canoeists complained about the current there, and one even said they almost flipped.  It looked calm, but there must be monsters (trolls?) under that bridge the get enjoyment from rolling canoes over.

I think my future paddling adventures will be on calmer water until I learn more.

We survived it - bus ride back

We survived it – bus ride back

Once I was home, I went to bed early and slept for 13 hours.  Canoeing didn’t seem strenuous.  I think the stress did me in as much as anything else.

This morning I woke up quite sore.  I have a banged and scraped knee.  My right hand at the base of the thumb has a deep, painful bruise.  I have a scraped ankle, sore spots on my feet, and a scrape on my ass.

I’m still better off than Robin.  She has at least as many bumps and scrapes as I do.  She also hurt her finger.  It may be broken.  It was quite swollen today.  I helped her cut a ring off that was constricting the swollen finger.  She hated to lose the ring, but it’s better than losing a finger.

I think Robin and I learned things about each other too.  Neither of us behaved that well to each other under stress.  Does that mean we avoid canoeing together?  Do we work on technique?  I don’t know.  I’ll have to discuss it with her once she’s willing.

Where Did May Go?

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I last posted on the last day of April.  Today is the last day of May.  What’s been going on?  A lot.

Part of the problem is that I’ve been posting on Google+ instead of my blog.

Although I rode my bike everyday in April, I only managed 300 miles.  In May, I skipped the odd day when I didn’t work.  I still managed 358 miles.  Still down from my normal, but things are improving.

I’m getting more miles on the recumbent.  My neck will bother me if I take a long ride on the other bikes.  If I buy another bike it’ll probably be a recumbent, as I can ride those with no issues.

I’m still spending a lot of time with Robin, and I enjoy that time a lot.  We spent a day at Millionaire’s Row at Churchill Downs.

Churchill Downs

Churchill Downs

I bought Robin a bike.

Robin and her new bike

Robin and her new bike

Robin has been a good sport and ridden her bike a fair amount.  She also ridden on the back of the Big Dummy a few times.

One hell of a rig

One hell of a rig

What’s next?  I’m heading out with a few friends on Saturday for a four-day tour around southern Indiana.  We’re camping at four state parks.

Stay tuned!

 

Back In The Saddle – April 1st

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Flooding in Cherokee Park

Flooding in Cherokee Park

That’s right.  I’m back to my old self.  My neck still hurts, but I can ride again.   I can even ride a drop-bar road bike.  It’s a shame I sold my LHT, but I needed the money.

April is 30 days of biking.  I have to be on the bike every day of the month.  It doesn’t matter if I’m riding 100 miles or 1 block, but I have to ride.

I’ve been back on the bike for commuting the past two weeks.  Things have improved.  I’ve mostly rode the single-speed, but took the Big Dummy shopping on Thursday.

Today, April 1st started with rain and thunderstorms.  I assumed I’d be riding around the block.  I had tentative plans to ride with Tim and Timothy, but woke up to crappy weather.  Robin had stayed with me, and she reminded me I had to ride.

The weather cleared out, and I took off to meet in St. Matthews.  Tim never showed.  He had a bad day.  Timothy was there, and we rode 20-ish miles.  We helped an older gentleman on a recumbent trike fix a flat tire.  It ended up being a beautiful day and there were many cyclists out.  My total miles for the day were 30.8.  I’ll take it.  I did it all on the single-speed, even over the hills of Cherokee Park.

Later in the day I went with Robin to pick up her new TV, her first HDTV.  I programmed her UVerse box to work with it, and then took hours to figure out the remote programming.  She rewarded me with apple pie and ice cream.

Tomorrow I ride to work.  This is easy.  Iv’e been back at it for two weeks.

After work, I’ll be at Robin’s to watch UK win the NCAA basketball championship on her new TV.

Life is good.

January Miles and (Lack of) Progress

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Between my car-rental drive to Bowling Green and driving Robin’s car for us to do stuff together, I drove 356 miles for the month.  It would normally not be difficult to ride my bike more than that in a month, but I’ve had a really off month.

I only rode my bike 160.6 miles.  My neck and shoulder have conspired to keep me off the bike much of the time.  I made good use of carpooling, the bus, and the occasional cab ride to get to work.  I’ve even walked the 3.5 miles home from downtown once.

I quit weighing myself recently, but I’ll be doing that again now.  I had quit posting my weight a while before that, but I’ll get that caught up soon.

Now that I have an iPhone I downloaded the  MyFitnessPal app to track what I eat.  I’ve also downloaded the EEBA app to help me budget my money using virtual envelopes.  We’ll see how that works out.

The last two days have been much less painful than before.  I feel like I can function normally.  I didn’t ride my bike yesterday, because I had to return the rental car and walk to work from there.  I took the bus home.  Today, I rode the single-speed and it felt wonderful.  I’ll be on it again tomorrow.

I still have an appointment with a neurosurgeon on Monday.  I’d like to avoid surgery, so I’ll get a second opinion if he immediately suggests it.  If two doctors suggest it, I’ll go through with it.

Things are going well between Robin and I.  I like the fact that we’re both comfortable living where we do… two blocks apart.  Seriously, I just know I need to avoid pushing things faster (or further) than they need to go.  We are seeing each other exclusively, but I really don’t feel comfortable discussing much more here.

Tomorrow (Wednesday) is also the Car-Free Happy Hour.  This is technically January’s event as it was delayed a week.  Will you join us at 5:30pm at Four Pegs at 1053 Goss Ave 40217.  I may ride my bike there, or just walk.  It’s very close to my house.

Weight?  Weight!  Wait?  No, don’t wait.  I still need to lose about 55lbs to make it to my goal weight.  A reasonable goal is one pound per week, giving me about a year to do this.  So 175lbs by 2013.  Could the iPhone be the tool I need to do this?

With my new phone comes a new phone number.  I used to publish my old one pretty openly, but I’m not doing that any more.  That’s why I didn’t port the number to the new phone.  If you need my number, send me an email, and I’ll get back to you.

Off The Bike

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My neck issue is pushing me off the bike for a while.  I’m tired of fighting the pain.  I see a neurosurgeon in two weeks.  Then it’ll be time for more decisions.  In the meantime I’m staying off the bike.  Even the recumbent hurts me on bad days.

My eating habits are only slightly better than before.  I have purchased a new hot-air popcorn popper.  I used it tonight.  Plain popcorn used to be a comfort food for me, but I had thrown away the old popper.  Now I can go back to this filling, low-calorie, snack that I used to enjoy.

In spite of the challenges, I’m in a good mood.  I’m not trying too hard to lose weight, just trying to prevent myself from gaining for a while.  Things are working well with Robin.  We’re now going out and doing something besides eating.  We saw a concert on Friday and a movie on Sunday.  We met with my daughter and her boyfriend on Saturday, but we did go out to eat then.

I feel more motivated to take care of housework and other related duties than I have in a while.

I probably won’t see Robin next weekend, but that will give me time to thoroughly clean house and catch up on other duties that need to be done.

I’ll take the bus to work most days now that I’m not riding my bike.  I’m considering walking a couple of days a week though, including tomorrow.  At least it’s still exercise and it doesn’t seem to hurt.

Wake Up?

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It’s fitting that I’m writing a post titled “Wake Up?” at 3:00am somehow…  It is interesting laying in bed on a January night with the window open listening to a thunderstorm.  A few days ago temperatures were in the teens.  Tonight it’s 55F.

I didn’t ride the recumbent today (yesterday?).  This became important later.

I rode the Big Dummy.  I had my doctor appointment with my new family doctor.  I like my new doctor.  He’s nice, competent, and is honest.  He pointed out that my overeating and drinking are not only working against my weight loss effort (what weight loss effort?), but are adding to my depression.

So anyway, I met up with Tim again after work for our hour-long spin that we often do on Mondays.  As we rode more, my neck hurt worse.  It probably wouldn’t have been an issue on the ‘bent.  When we were nearing the end, I headed back on Payne St rather than following him back to his car on Mellwood Ave.  I wanted to cut the ride short.

I could have/should have went home.  Instead I stopped for food and beer.  I had my laptop with me so I made use of the free wi-fi and posted about my gastronomical disaster on BikeForums.

I went to bed after getting home.  I woke up in the middle of the night and looked at my post on BikeForums.  Apparently many people are supporting me and want me to continue the weight loss.  There’s a bit of “tough love” including from some strangers.  :)

The BikeForums post, the discussion with Tim while riding, and my doctor’s advice are all ganging up on me.  It is time to make a change.  Sure I lost 100lbs in 2007-2008.  Since then I’ve either held steady or gained.  I’m up 30lbs from my lowest weight.  I don’t want to be The Fat Guy anymore.

The neck pain has mostly ended long rides, but I can change that by riding the recumbent.  I just have to push myself out there and I will ride.  I miss disappearing for a day with the bike and a camera.  I can still do it.

I’m not spending any large amounts of money on bike stuff for a bit.  Long-term, I don’t know what bike(s) I’ll be riding.  I have one bike that I can ride a lot now, even with my neck issue.  It really doesn’t need anything other than maybe better lights, but I’ll use what I have for now.  The last time I spent money on that bike (upgraded brakes) I barely rode it for months because my neck improved.  Not that I’m complaining…

I need to make some major dietary changes, but I’m not writing out new rules here right now.  I’ve done that a few times recently and failed each time.  I’m going to make some changes now, but the changes are more minor and less strict.  I’ll figure out more later.  I will start riding more immediately also.

There’s also the issue of Robin.  We tend to go out to eat every day.  She wants to make changes too, so maybe it’s time.  Overall, I think she eats better than I do.  We’ll need to figure out social activities that don’t involve copious consumption of calories.

Discomfort

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I’m barely riding the bike.  I’m gaining weight.  My neck has been, well, a pain in the neck.  I missed another day of work on Thursday due to it.

I don’t mean to sound too negative.  A lot of good stuff is going on.  I bought a new laptop on Friday to replace the one that died a few months ago.  I’ve been spending my weekends with Robin.  I have a doctor appointment tomorrow and will figure out what to do next for treatment of my neck.

Robin bought me a heating pad, mostly because I’m too stubborn to buy one myself.  I’ve been enjoying good company, good food, and good beer.

I bought some new clothing and a stand for my new laptop, so I can sit in a more comfortable chair and still use it.

I’ll be riding the recumbent to the doctor then to work tomorrow.  There’s a good chance of rain, so I’ll be carrying dry clothes with me.  At least the rain will finish melting the little bit of snow off the ground.

Goodbye 2011. What’s In Store Now?

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I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions.  When it’s time for a change, you should work at it immediately.  I do, however, believe in looking back at things.  I’m looking back at 2011.

Bike Miles

I rode 5502.9 miles in 2011.  That’s more than 400 miles over 2010′s 5087.2.  By comparison, 2009 was only 3860 miles.  November 2011 was a new personal record month.  I had 697.7 miles.  December is my best December yet, but nothing exceptional at 444.9 miles.

I hope to surpass 6000 miles in 2012, and have a one-month best of 750 miles.

Car-Free

I sold my truck and became car-free on November 4th.  I’m still adjusting to living without a car, but it’s not a difficult adjustment after living most of the year as if I were already car-free.

Bikes

I bought the Big Dummy as my car truck replacement once I knew I actually would sell the truck.  I still have some fit issues to get dialed in, but the bike has been great at hauling things (and people!).

I’ve spent a lot of money on bikes this year.  In addition to buying the Big Dummy, I bought a SON dynohub and lighting system for the LHT in April.  I later moved the wheel and lights to the single-speed.

In March, I bought a used kid-trailer as an affordable cargo hauler.  I haven’t used it since buying the Big Dummy, but it could be useful to tow it with the Big Dummy if I really need to haul a lot.

In December I bought new wheels (including Shimano dynohub) for the LHT.  I also bought new brakes.  Now, January 1st, the bike is still partially assembled in my kitchen.

Health

2011 has been a challenging year due to health issues.

In June I had a horrible neck pain problem.  It kept me off the bike briefly.  It made me miss some longer pleasure rides that I wanted to do.  With some treatment and strength training it was resolved to the point that I can function normally, but it never went away.

In September I was hospitalized due to a bowel obstruction.  Luckily it resolved without surgery, but it was scary.  I only missed one important ride, and had no lasting effects.

On the day after Christmas my neck issue returned.  I’m still struggling with it, and I see myself riding the recumbent more often now.  I wasn’t car-free last time, so my options are a bit more limited now.

The various doctor visits may have actually added to my overall mileage for the year.  I had doctor visits in New Albany and east of Lyndon that took me a bit farther for transportation cycling than I normally go.

Weight

Ah, the elephant in the room.  First let’s look at my monthly average weight since I started tracking it in 10/2007.  Up until July 2009, things look great, then a bit of a bump, lost again, then steady increase since March 2010.

Now let’s look at the same values beginning January 2009.  You’ll notice that most of it is between 200 and 220lbs.  That changes when it goes above 230 in July 2011.  It stays above 230 until the last two month of the year.

It’s a little bit depressing, but not all that surprising.  I’ve been treating myself to good food and beer as if I don’t have a weight problem.  I not going to give these things up, but I need to make better decisions on how much and how often to consume these things.

2011 was not a good year for weight loss.  I ended the year 13lbs heavier than I started it.  Ugh.  As Tim would say, I have an “intake valve problem”.

Exercise

Other than cycling I’ve done little exercising.  I had my push-up plan back in 2008 that I abandoned after suffer shoulder pain.  I’m supposed to be using some dumbbells to strengthen my upper body to help with the neck and shoulder issues, but I’ve not been using them as much as I should.

I was training for a triathlon early in the year, but ditched that after suffering problems in the swim portion of the training.  I did not enjoy the running, but I was capable of performing what was needed.

I did race my first bicycle race in November, the Gravel Grovel.  I met my goal of less that 6.5 hrs (just over 6 hours).

My biggest problem right now, is that my most common exercise other than cycling is the 12 ounce lift (lifting the beer to my lips).

Relationships

Okay, where to begin?

When I started this blog in November of 2007, my 13-year marriage was ending.  I didn’t talk about it publicly for months, but it was happening.

I married Kristy in 2009.  It was a much different marriage than the first, but didn’t work out for much different reasons.  We are now officially divorced.

Interesting tidbit.  I met an interesting woman, Robin, a few days ago.  My desires in a relationship are a bit different now.  I’m not ready to rush in to living together or marriage (eek!  I said the M word!), but she lives nearby (walking distance, no bike even needed!) and we have some common interests.  We rang in the new year together.  I’m not going to talk much more about her for the time being.

2012

Most goals stay the same.  Goal weight of 175lbs.  Stay sane.  Be happy.

Some goals have changed.  Ride 6000 miles for the year.  Ride 750 miles or more in at least one month.  Save more money.

All of this is for nothing if the Mayans were right.

Happy New Year everyone!