Porter

My round-trip commute to work and back was a measly 7.7 miles.  It was an easy ride on the single-speed.  After arriving home, I made a grocery list, and headed back out for a whole 1.5 miles to the local grocery store.

A porter is someone or something that carries stuff.  My bicycle was my porter.  I had a gallon of milk, snacks for bike rides this weekend, veggies, meat, bread, peanut butter, and a six-pack of Bluegrass Brewing Company Dark Star Porter.

I’m spending the evening being very domestic.  I’m trying to keep my housework manageable.  I want to spend the weekend on the bike.

I mentioned in previous posts that I’ve been depressed.  I think a weekend of bike riding is just what I need.

I accidently left my refrigerator unplugged overnight and all day today.  I threw away a few things, but there wasn’t much in there anyway.

I’m in a mental funk.  I haven’t eaten poorly today, but my trip to Four Pegs last night was a bad idea.  I ate dinner with Robin tonight, and I helped cook.  Now I’m back home and still feeling down.

I think my blog issues are solved.  I’m going to give it a few more days before calling it a success.

My neck continues to improve.  It’s a gradual change.  It still hurts, but my range-of-motion is better.  It doesn’t hurt to ride a bike, even with drop bars.

It annoys me to no end that I had to sell bikes to pay taxes.  Tim and Timothy rode a hilly 62 miles today.  I could have probably gotten the day off work and joined them, but I don’t have a bike that fits that kind of riding.  It would have been possible on the recumbent, but not ideal.  I know there’s a new bike in my future, when I can afford it.

Ready for the commute

I had hoped to ride at least ten miles today.  I only rode 7.7.  Taking the long way to work would have done it.  Taking the long way home would have too.  I could run an errand and hit the goal too, but I have no motivation.  I rode to work and back that’s enough.

The ride to work was uneventful.  The trip home was interesting.  There must be some convention downtown.  Police were working the intersections and letting huge groups of pedestrians through while holding back traffic.  I sat in traffic as did the other bicyclist in this photo.

Downtown

I’ve been feeling fat and lazy.  I’m running low on cash, so at least I’m eating less.

I miss my LHT.  I no longer have a decent bike for hilly gravel rides.  There are two awesome rides this weekend.  Both are possible on the ‘bent, but neither is ideal.

My eating habits are only slightly better than before.  I have purchased a new hot-air popcorn popper.  I used it tonight.  Plain popcorn used to be a comfort food for me, but I had thrown away the old popper.  Now I can go back to this filling, low-calorie, snack that I used to enjoy.

In spite of the challenges, I’m in a good mood.  I’m not trying too hard to lose weight, just trying to prevent myself from gaining for a while.  Things are working well with Robin.  We’re now going out and doing something besides eating.  We saw a concert on Friday and a movie on Sunday.  We met with my daughter and her boyfriend on Saturday, but we did go out to eat then.

I feel more motivated to take care of housework and other related duties than I have in a while.

I probably won’t see Robin next weekend, but that will give me time to thoroughly clean house and catch up on other duties that need to be done.

I’ll take the bus to work most days now that I’m not riding my bike.  I’m considering walking a couple of days a week though, including tomorrow.  At least it’s still exercise and it doesn’t seem to hurt.

I didn’t ride the recumbent today (yesterday?).  This became important later.

I rode the Big Dummy.  I had my doctor appointment with my new family doctor.  I like my new doctor.  He’s nice, competent, and is honest.  He pointed out that my overeating and drinking are not only working against my weight loss effort (what weight loss effort?), but are adding to my depression.

So anyway, I met up with Tim again after work for our hour-long spin that we often do on Mondays.  As we rode more, my neck hurt worse.  It probably wouldn’t have been an issue on the ‘bent.  When we were nearing the end, I headed back on Payne St rather than following him back to his car on Mellwood Ave.  I wanted to cut the ride short.

I could have/should have went home.  Instead I stopped for food and beer.  I had my laptop with me so I made use of the free wi-fi and posted about my gastronomical disaster on BikeForums.

I went to bed after getting home.  I woke up in the middle of the night and looked at my post on BikeForums.  Apparently many people are supporting me and want me to continue the weight loss.  There’s a bit of “tough love” including from some strangers.  :)

The BikeForums post, the discussion with Tim while riding, and my doctor’s advice are all ganging up on me.  It is time to make a change.  Sure I lost 100lbs in 2007-2008.  Since then I’ve either held steady or gained.  I’m up 30lbs from my lowest weight.  I don’t want to be The Fat Guy anymore.

The neck pain has mostly ended long rides, but I can change that by riding the recumbent.  I just have to push myself out there and I will ride.  I miss disappearing for a day with the bike and a camera.  I can still do it.

I’m not spending any large amounts of money on bike stuff for a bit.  Long-term, I don’t know what bike(s) I’ll be riding.  I have one bike that I can ride a lot now, even with my neck issue.  It really doesn’t need anything other than maybe better lights, but I’ll use what I have for now.  The last time I spent money on that bike (upgraded brakes) I barely rode it for months because my neck improved.  Not that I’m complaining…

I need to make some major dietary changes, but I’m not writing out new rules here right now.  I’ve done that a few times recently and failed each time.  I’m going to make some changes now, but the changes are more minor and less strict.  I’ll figure out more later.  I will start riding more immediately also.

There’s also the issue of Robin.  We tend to go out to eat every day.  She wants to make changes too, so maybe it’s time.  Overall, I think she eats better than I do.  We’ll need to figure out social activities that don’t involve copious consumption of calories.

I just got back from Four Pegs, where I had food and too much beer.  I walked, so no drunk cycling involved.

I called a cab to get to work this morning.  My neck pain made riding a bike pretty much impossible.  A co-worker gave me a ride home.

Patrick noted in a text message to me that I’m probably going to have a weekend without much cycling.  He was referring to “Robin the Redhead”.  :)  Although it’s probably true, it’s more to do with my neck pain.

I intend to ride the recumbent tomorrow.  We’ll see how that goes.  The pain was bad enough today that even that wouldn’t have worked well.  Even driving would have been problematic.

Unless my neck settles down, 2012 will be the year of neck surgery.  I’m not looking forward to such things, but if this is the alternative, I’ll take the surgery.

It’s strange, I’ve been slightly depressed all day, yet really looking forward to when Robin gets back in town tomorrow.  That won’t fix my neck issue, but will make me feel better anyway.

Dummy on the road

Friday
On Friday I rode the Big Dummy over 50 miles.  I rode out to Prospect to look at a used laptop.  I didn’t buy it.  I then headed out to Bluegrass Bicycle in Crestwood to pick up my new wheels for the LHT.  I took some really hilly roads on the way there and back.  I made a day out of it and stopped for food in Crestwood and coffee in Prospect.

Both Sleepy Hollow Rd and Covered Bridge Rd were very nice.  US42 wasn’t.

Saturday

Saturday was Christmas Eve.  I met up with others (I think it was Tim, Patrick, and Asher, but my memory is shot) early in the morning.  After riding around town for a while, I went to OYLC and hung out until noon, then went home.

Christmas
I didn’t leave home on Christmas.  I had a splitting headache most of the day.  I hoped my daughter would drop by but she never did.  I talked to friends and family on the phone.  I worked on my LHT, installing the new wheels and brakes.  I moved the bar-end shifters to the downtube, and re-cabled everything.

Monday
I still wasn’t feeling well, but I rode the updated LHT for a quick coffee ride with Tim.  I immediately hated the downtube shifting.  I’ll be switching back to bar-ends soon.  Sooner is better than later, as that’s the only bike the studded tires will fit, and I don’t think I’ll get much more good weather.

My neck and shoulder issue also flared up on Monday as has been getting worse ever since.

Since then…
I was back at work yesterday.  I rode the Big Dummy so I could haul dog food after work.  I rode the single-speed today and my neck was at it’s worst this morning.  It hurt bad enough that I got off the bike and walked about a mile.  This afternoon was better.  I’m hoping it’s easing up again.  I’ll know more in the morning.

Today was also the Car-Free Happy Hour.  We had a good turnout at Irish Rover on Frankfort Ave.  I think the 25 or so of us that showed up overwhelmed them a bit.  Although it obviously stressed out the server, she handled it well.

Holiday Season?
This is  generally a stressful time of year for everyone.  I was lonely on Christmas.  It was probably best that I was alone with the horrid headache I had.  Thanksgiving was better.  Patrick had invited me over, and I got to know his family.  I’m now invited to Andy’s house for New Year’s Day brunch.  I’m glad I have a few friends in the area.

My divorce is final as of Monday.  I found out yesterday, and got the paperwork today.

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what could be done differently.  I’m done thinking about it now.  It feels like self-flagellation, and I don’t want to do that anymore.

When I talk to people about it they seem torn between saying “I’m sorry” and “Congratulations!”.  It’s kind of funny.  In reality it’s just closure and that’s a good thing.

On Friday, some co-workers were getting together to go out for food and beer.  I was invited, and social occasions are allowed per my self-imposed rules.  The fact I had an overly-large lunch earlier wasn’t good, but whatever.

I had a beer called “Morning Wood”, and I even shared my “Morning Wood”.  I made a (probably annoying) comment about the bike rack being free when others were complaining about parking meters.

I slept in Saturday.  I went out for a ride with Tim.  I got about 23 miles in.  I ate leftover split-pea soup.  I hadn’t gone grocery shopping.  I really wanted to go out for food and beer.  I successfully suppressed those urges.

I got up early today, Sunday, to meet Tim, Patrick, and Asher for a ride today.  I left before sunrise in the cold air.  It was a good ride, mostly urban.  Nothing epic, just four guys riding around.  I did have some snacks at coffee shops, but nothing extreme.  I ended the day with over 46 miles.

Again, later in the day I was really wanting to go out for food and beer.  I still haven’t gone grocery shopping.  I’m cooking a simple peas and rice dish that I actually have the stuff to make.  I’m not going back out, because if I do, I’ll find myself gorged on food and sloshing full of beer.

I’m slightly depressed because I know I shouldn’t go out to eat and drink.  Adding to that is the fact that I don’t like the way I feel about it.  I didn’t have this much trouble controlling my eating and drinking three and four years ago.  Why now?

I am killing time and forgetting about food for a while by burying myself in reading.  I’m currently reading Spin, which I highly recommend, at least if you’re into science fiction.

I have three bikes I’d like to add to my stable.  A road/brevet bike.  A dedicated gravel bike, and a mountain bike.

In addition to that, I have a wishlist of stuff for my existing bikes.  My LHT needs some work.  I want to swap out most of the drivetrain.  I want different brakes.  I want different front and rear racks, new wheels, lighting.  Ugh.  This gets expensive very quickly.

I’m trying to prioritize what to do first.  I already have a new front derailleur on order for the LHT, but that’s a repair.  I could have new wheels built for that bike, using the existing hubs, and that would be a repair also, as the brake tracks are very worn on the rims.  I don’t want to use the existing front hub though.  I want a dyno-hub for powering a new lighting system.  Although I already had a dyno-wheel built for that bike, I ended up using it on the single-speed.

My next big purchase was going to be a frameset for the road/brevet bike, but now I’m reconsidering that.  I’m thinking I need to put the money into the LHT to get it ready to be a do-almost-anything bike.  Some of what I’d do is repairs.  Some of it is upgrades.

I spent several hours looking at bike stuff online today.  I could have done something useful in that time, but I didn’t.

I’m going to go do some housework now.  Something useful.

I’m having a rough week.  I met with a lawyer on Tuesday to get the divorce started.  Papers were completed today and I stopped in to sign them.  I know I don’t like the way this whole ordeal has made me feel.  From what little Kristy has said, she’s feeling much the same way.

I wasn’t in the mood to cook after I got home today, but I wasn’t going to go out either.  I decided to read another book.  I burned through an entire novel, albeit an easy-reading one, in about three hours.  Once done, I revisited the dinner situation.

I had leftover spaghetti that I cooked yesterday.  I’ve been out of beer, and I’m not going out for more.  That’s probably a good thing.

I have several ride options for tomorrow, but I’m not sure I want to ride tomorrow.  I have a gravel ride with Patrick and Tim on Sunday.  I could stand to do some housework and yardwork tomorrow.  On the other hand, Timothy is putting on another LBC populaire tomorrow.

Maybe I’ll get up at 6:00am, eat a good breakfast, and decide what to do from there.

I’m going to go escape reality in my favorite fashion.  I’m going to sleep.

I’m thankful I have friends to join for Thanksgiving dinner.

I’m thankful I have friends that like to ride bikes in all kinds of crazy adventures.

I’m thankful for my job where I earn a decent living.

I’m thankful for my dynohub and headlight lighting my on the fast descent down Wolf Pen Branch Rd on the way home from Patrick’s house tonight.  :)

I met up with Tim and Timothy this morning for a pre-Thanksgiving ride.  It was a slow pace, and we cut the ride a bit short.  Tim and I stopped at three different coffee shops though.  That ride was 27.7 miles.

I rode out to Patrick’s house for Thanksgiving dinner.  I appreciate having company and it was a pleasure meeting Patrick’s family.  The “bit o’ bourbon” was nice too.  I took the long way home in the dark.  Round-trip mileage was 28.5 miles.

Total mileage for the day was 56.2.  I’m sure I ate more calories than I burned, but I don’t feel like a total glutton.

What a strange trip it’s been.

• Diet, exercise, bought a scale and an elliptical
• Got divorced
• Bought a bike
• Got rid of the elliptical
• Became a bicycle commuter
• Appeared on TV
• Made new friends
• Lost nearly 100 lbs
• Met another woman
• Got married
• Moved into Louisville
• Gained 30 lbs
• Split up again – heading for divorce
• Continued a destructive lifestyle
• Went car-free

It’s time for me to reflect where I’ve been and where I need to go.  I’ve gotten too used to “instant gratification” in everything.  I feel I “deserve” things that in the long-term are bad for me.  So I’ve gained weight.

This is more than eat less/ride more.  This is my relationship with food.

Looking back on old posts to write this has been illuminating and given me new incentive to work at this again.  The wedding pictures especially.  I was about 20lbs lighter then than I am now, and I looked quite a bit better.

So, I’m going to work harder and see where I am in another year.  I hope some of you hang out and enjoy the ride with me.

Sometime in the next few months I’m going to create a camping pack that will contain everything I need for an impromptu camping trip.  Next time an opportunity pops up, whether a car-camping trip like this one, or a last-minute S24O, I’ll be prepared.

We really had no goal.  I wasn’t feeling strong (hell, my legs still hurt) so we didn’t ride fast.  I brought my camera along for the ride, but never even got it out.

After he went home, I sat at Cumberland having food and beer.  I ended the day at about 43 miles.

Once home, I did yard work and housework.  I really need to go grocery shopping again, but I hate grocery shopping and I’m constantly putting it off to the last minute.  I’ll do it another day.

I realized today how lazy I’ve become recently.  I’m having trouble doing the things that need to be done.  My house is a mess.  I’m letting things fall behind.  I’m not even eating properly, and I’m gaining weight again.

I’m not drinking enough water.  I did drink out of my water bottle during the ride, but then I was drinking beer before heading home.  We’ve all made jokes about hydrating with beer, but beer is lousy for hydration.  I spent a good part of the day after getting home being dehydrated and feeling sick.  I drank a huge glass of water which helped.  I’m now drinking a huge mug of herbal tea.

Yep, I’m in a mental funk.  Even when I’m not, I’m lazy and eat poorly.  I’m not sure how I got this way over the last few years.  I’ve made drastic lifestyle changes before.  I think it’s time to do it again.

I rode the Big Dummy and met Tim at Highland Coffee.  We enjoyed snacks and coffee before heading downtown then out River Rd.

We turned off and unto the Butchertown Greenway.  This was a peaceful stretch until on a blind curve the path was covered with walnuts.  There was also a cyclist standing astride his bike talking on the phone.  We made it through with no issue and continued on.

After a few more city streets we were on the Beargrass Creek Trail.  I really like this trail, and the Big Dummy makes quite the racket rolling over the bridges there.

After getting through the Lexington Rd/Grinstead Dr intersection we went through Cherokee Park, then into some neighborhood streets.

Eventually Tim went home, and I still needed more coffee and a proper breakfast.  I went to Twig and Leaf for an omelette and coffee.  The Big Dummy got quite a bit of attention from a group of cyclists who were finishing up their breakfast.  I then headed for home.

The Big Dummy is not a fast bike, but I was lightly loaded for today’s trip.  I rode 18.9 miles in an urban area with some small hills.  There were many stops.  My average rolling speed was 11.8mph.  I’m sure with a light load and flat straight roads and no stops, my speed wouldn’t be much less than on the LHT.  I did exceed 32mph on a downhill on Eastern Parkway.

I’m feeling quite lazy today.  I need to do yard work, housework, and go grocery shopping.  I’m not sure how much of that will get done today.

Click for full view

We had a server failure on Saturday.  I needed to get in early-ish today (Monday).  I woke up late and grumpy, so I drove to work.

Today was a whirlwind of activity.  I was there for over 12 hours.  I felt slightly stressed at times, but never overwhelmed (despite the problems we ran into).  I guess I’m a good problem solver but bad at time-management.  Time-management isn’t much of an issue during an emergency.

The problems are solved.  I stayed late to fix things.  I got home happy but hungry.

Despite “reminding myself” recently about weight loss and such, I went out for a burger and beer.  It was worthwhile.

Tomorrow, I’m back on the bike.  It’ll be a long day with a morning doctor appointment providing extra mileage.

I need to incorporate this productiveness into everyday.  Not only do I do better at work, I feel better about it later.

Monthly Average Weight

When I was having the most weight loss I was constantly reminding myself about my progress.  That was the point of this blog.

Since then, It’s turned into either talking about bike rides or complaining about depression.  Both of those affect my weight loss and will still be mentioned here, but I need to get back to basics and post my weight daily.  I just recently started weighing regularly again.

So there is now a Daily Weigh-In link under the pages section.  I’ll keep it as updated as possible.  It also has a link to a chart of my monthly progress that I’ll keep updated on a monthly basis.  I’m putting the chart here also, that is updated through September.

I’ve had some weight loss for the last two weeks.  I need to keep that going.

I think getting out of the hospital just made me so happy that I’m still overflowing with happiness… even though my vacation is over and I went back to work today.

I was beginning to get a bit worried about my digestive system again today.  There was pressure building up.  However, I’m happy to report that “everything has come out okay” this evening.  I do have a doctor appointment in a week to hopefully figure out what happened and how to avoid it.

I was sore today.  My legs hurt from the riding I did this weekend.  I didn’t do a lot of riding (80 or 90 miles over two days), but much of it was at a faster tempo than I’m used to and I was riding the single speed.

I had a massage after work, but I still have one muscle in particular that is bugging me.  Oh well.  It’ll loosen up.

I’m riding the LHT tomorrow.  I need to haul the trailer to pick up dog food.  I’ve done that with the single-speed, but it’s generally not a good idea.  There is no totally flat way to get home from Feeder’s Supply.

Living without a car takes more planning.  I’m prone to laziness and procrastination.  I’ll adjust.

I’m eating a lot of soup and getting by.

I intended to get up early this morning to do dishes and cook more food.  I overslept, and only woke up when Tim sent me a text to let me know he was at Sunergos, which is quite near my house.

I quickly dressed and rode the single-speed there.  We enjoyed coffee and scones and headed to Vic’s Classsic Bikes, where the LBC has a Sunday morning ride.

There was a decent size group on the ride (25+?).  I felt strong and Tim and I were running with the faster pack, although this isn’t a fast ride, but it felt good not to drop off the back.

After some flattish miles at 18-19mph up River Rd we turned up Lime Kiln.  I’ve done this mild climb on the single-speed before, usually with a commuting load, so it wasn’t a big deal.  I stood on the pedals and actually started passing people.  That left me quite winded near the top, so I dropped back where Tim was in the pack.

We made our way to Glenview Ave then back to River Rd then turned south into Indian Hills.  I struggled a little on the climbs here, but caught back up with the group.

We continued on through St Matthews, Seneca Park, then Cherokee Park.  I pushed to the front of the pack somewhere along there, and I saw a cyclist ahead who I thought was in our group turn right at what I think was Alta Vista Rd.  I didn’t know the route, so I followed.  Then I saw our group go flying straight through the intersection.

I did a quick U-turn and dropped the front wheel off the pavement into the ditch.  I went over the bars and rolled off my back unto my butt in the grass.  It didn’t hurt other than a slight tweak to my wrist.

I jumped up and began the chase to catch up.  I also managed to tweak my right (rear) brake lever, but it was still functional.

I wasn’t able to catch the group and I wasn’t even sure I was going the right way.  I eventually saw Tim waiting for me.  He did say this was a “dont’ drop Dave day”.  I guess that’s fair, considering I just got out of the hospital.  :)

Tim and I continued on along to Vic’s where the fast group was already loading their bikes up.  Vic, and the rest of them rolled up slightly after us.

Tim and I left and went for coffee and snacks at Breadworks.  While there we exchanged text messages with Patrick who was heading our way for a ride.  Tim needed to head home, so once Patrick arrived, He and I wandered westward, past the zoo, eventually heading north toward downtown.

Patrick and I kept a decent pace heading west from downtown into a headwind and into Shawnee Park.  At that point I was cooked, and we slowed down.

We refilled our water bottles at Shawnee and took the Riverwalk as far east as we could, up to the closed section behind the golf course, then took city streets back to Baxter Ave and to Vic’s as I needed to buy some supplies.

Vic was busy helping to bike tourists traveling for Oregon to Virginia, so Patrick and I went across the street for coffee at Quills… and another snack.

Patrick headed home, and I went back over to Vic’s.  I wanted to buy a T-handle allen wrench to fit my brake levers, but he didn’t have one.  I did buy new brake cables, housing, and doo-dads for the ends of each.  I also bought some new bar tape.  Vic is big into cloth bar tape, but I wanted the cork-like stuff.  I wanted a dull red, but he didn’t have red at all.  Patrick had suggested the blue earlier, but I didn’t like that idea with the red accents on the bike.

So, I’m a man.  I can handle it.  I bought (censored*) bar tape.  I’ll have pictures once I’ve completed the work.

I then rode to Keith’s Hardware, just a few blocks down the road and picked up the allen wrenches, then headed home.  I arrived home with 55 miles for the day.  I’m considering going out again today, but I have much to do including fixing my brakes and re-wrapping the bars with (censored*) tape.

I do have tomorrow off work still, as another vacation day, as I was originally going to Michigan this weekend.  I’ll get more riding in then too.

* You’ll have to wait for the pictures to know what color it is.

I was eavesdropping on an older couple on their first date from some online dating service.  It didn’t appear to be going well, but I got the impression they were going to spend the night together.  I walked home alone.  I wasn’t jealous of the guy, I would have ditched the woman.  :)

So, I ate too much and spent too much.  Tomorrow is the car-free happy-hour, and I barely have enough money for that.

Things were better at work today.  My mood took a nosedive once I got home.  I had errands to run (in the truck) and my mood improved.  One of the errands was grocery shopping, and I bought ice cream and beer, so that always brightens my day, even if for the wrong reasons.

I’ve pretty much concluded that my planned century ride in Michigan this Sunday (Apple Cider Century) is not going to happen.  I’m registered and everything, but with money being tight, affording gas for the drive is doubtful, and a hotel room is out of the question.  I considered camping, but the weather will be cool with a chance of rain.  Not ideal for camping.  If I change my mind and go anyway, I’ll tough it out in a tent.

If I don’t go, I have a four-day weekend, so I’ll go on several long rides over my long weekend.

Eh, whatever.  I’m just glad yesterday is over with.

I don’t want to be alone.  I need to be alone.  Today, I’d be a irritant to anyone I try to talk to.  So, dear readers, today, that’s you.  Luckily, you have the option of walking away and I won’t even know since your on the other end of the ethernet cable – or wifi connection.

Over the last week I’ve been riding my bike, doing housework, working on bikes, reading books, browsing the web, and of course, working to try and feel useful.  Today, I’ve gotten to where I don’t feel like doing those things.  Sure, I rode my bike to work, did my IT stuff for eight hours, and have been cooking since getting home, but it wasn’t working to ease my mood.

I don’t feel useful – to myself or anyone else.  I’m sure things will get better.  I almost didn’t write this, but I felt it was one useful thing I could do today.

Is there a point to this post?  I’m not sure.  Maybe I’m just venting.  Hopefully I’ll sleep well tonight and be prepared for tomorrow.

Around 10:30, Tim picked me up and we went to Waverly HIlls Park for some mountain bike riding.  I don’t own a mountain bike, so Tim loaned me one of his, a Redline Monocog.  It’s a single-speed mountain bike.  I’ve ridden it before.  We tooled around on the trails for about an hour.  One hour of mountain biking is a lot more exercise than one hour of road riding.

I had moved the dyno-powered lights from my LHT to the single-speed some time ago.  I had also bought new bar tape for the bike, but hadn’t gotten around to it yet.  So, I wrapped the bars.  This is my first time wrapping bars, and it shows.  It’ll work, but I’ll need more practice.

I used red electrical tape at the ends of the bar tape.  I didn’t do a very good job, but it’ll be fine comfort-wise.  It just doesn’t look good.

I did yard work, lubed the chains on the bikes.  I’ve got a little housework to do.  I’m fighting the urge to go out for dinner (which will mean drinking beer).

No matter what I do the rest of the day, I can call today a good day.

Tomorrow will begin with a 6:00am bike ride.  I’d better not stay up late.  :)

I’ve done this before.  I know the doctor will come in and talk to me briefly before another nurse leads me to the treatment room.

He does.  I tell him this will probably be my last epidural – that I’m scared shitless of them now.

The nurse takes me to the treatment room.  I take off my shirt and put on the gown.  I lay down face-first on the treatment table.  The x-ray machine is put in place over my neck.  This is used to place the needle correctly in my spine.

My heart started racing.  I couldn’t breath.  I told them to stop.  They moved the x-ray machine and I got up.  They hadn’t gone as far as prepping my skin, but that was the next step.  I was done.  I just wanted out.

I apologized to the the doctor for leaving, but dressed and left.

On the ride home my mind was battling between shame and relief.

I’ve been at risk of undoing much of the health improvements I’ve done over the last four years.  My eating habits are not only directly unhealthy, but not great for my mental health with the self-loathing I feel after a whole week of eating bad… week after week.

I’ve let myself get lazy and distracted.  I haven’t been keeping up on household chores.  I’ve basically been a mess.

I’m going to refocus.  I’m weighing myself again.  I haven’t started posting it again because the page is crazy with too much data.  I’ll find a better way to present it soon.  My weight this morning was 236.4lbs.  That’s higher than it’s been since October of 2008.

I need to stop going out to eat so much.  Going out for pizza or a burger and a beer three or four times a week is not only working against my goals, but is costing too much money.

Today, I cooked a pork chop on the grill and had celery sticks.   I have leftovers for lunch tomorrow.  It was a sensible size portion and I drank water with it.

More Goals

In December 2008 I listed a few secondary goals.  I just revisited that.

• Learn to ride a unicycle (next year)
  I wisely gave up on this.
  
• Be car-free (three years away)
  Strangely enough, I’m on track for this.
  
• Either fix-up my house, or move (three years away)
  I moved more than a year ahead of the goal.
  
• Meet a woman crazy enough to like my lifestyle (never?)
  I got married – we’re split up now – don’t want to say much more than that.
  
• Ride a several hundred mile multi-day tour (next year?)
  Although late, I did this in March of this year.

Message From The Past

In January of 2009, I wrote something that I needed to read now.  Luckily, I do re-read my older blog entries occasionally.

I mention effort to save a life.  I was trying at the time to convince my audience that this is possible and necessary.  It turns out the audience is me in 2011.

Alright Then

If I fix my eating habits and focus more on productive activities, not only will I lose weight, but I should feel better about myself.  It’s not a cure for depression, but it means fewer bad days.

It’s strange that the things I crave when depressed (food & beer) are things that will eventually make me more depressed.  This is common.  What is it with the human psyche?

I’ve often heard of those who have anxiety issues along with depression.  That’s never been me.  Sometimes I get nervous, or scared, but I’ve never had an anxiety attack… until 30 minutes ago.

I’ve been depressed all day.  I’ve been unable to sleep tonight.  I was remembering that I have a massage appointment after work tomorrow.  Good!  Something to look forward to.  Then I remember I have an appointment on Wednesday to get another epidural.

I’ve already had two epidurals.  I was quite nervous about the first one, and I had a somewhat bad experience during the first epidural.  The relief I was received made it all worth it.  I wasn’t very nervous for the second one, and it went much smoother.

So, while laying in bed thinking about my upcoming epidural I got panicky.  My chest felt tight and I couldn’t breathe right.  I was re-living the sound and feel of the large needle sliding past my vertebrae.  I made up my mind that I can’t do it.  The realization that I can cancel the appointment is the only thing that calmed me.

Now I’m confused.  Why did I have an anxiety attack?  I’ve never had that problem before.  I’ll do some thinking during the day tomorrow.  I don’t really want to cancel the appointment.  I need the pain relief.  My neck is starting to hurt again and I have numbness down my arm.

I’m currently an emotional mess.  Today was the second anniversary of my second failed marriage.  I’m lonely, but know that I need to be alone.  I may never be able to have a live-in relationship.  Don’t worry.  I’m safe and I’m coping.  Writing about it helps sometimes.

Okay.  Back to bed I go.  I really need to sleep.

I’ve been in an emotional slump.  I tend to use food and beer as crutches.  That’s not good.  I’m slowly gaining weight.

I did spend a number of hours moving the dyno-wheel and lighting from the LHT to the single-speed.  It was a pain.  I know how to work on bikes, but I’m lousy at it.  I struggle with simple things.  I get it done, it just takes way too long.

I’m home sick today.  I haven’t left the house, and have no intention of doing so.  I have groceries so I’ll eat, and I’ll actually eat healthy today.  I’ve spent hours laying in bed.  Some of that time I was sleeping, some of it reading.

My kitchen is still a whirlwind of bike parts and tools.  I need to pick up the mess before I can cook.  <sigh>  Maybe I’ll just go lay in bed instead.

My sleep at the campground wasn’t bad.  I normally sleep poorly in a tent, but I was tired from the ride.  My bladder woke me at about 8:00am.  I was also quite cold, which was quite a change from when I first tried to sleep the night before.

I changed into fresh shorts and jersey and headed for the pit toilet.  I’m not squeamish about gross bathrooms when camping, but the bugs in this one were quite bad.

I went back to my campsite and struggled to get everything packed up.  I’m lousy at getting a tent rolled up to the proper size, which is quite important when bicycle camping.

When I was married to my first wife, she insisted that she would pack the tent so that I wouldn’t make a mess out of it.  :)

Once I had the bike packed, I rolled on out, at about 8:30.  I had an immediate need for coffee and a slightly less pressing need for food.  I’m going to have a fire and be able to cook and make coffee for any future camping trips.

I began the ride by backtracking my way down Hwy 62 and 462.  I deviated from my route by taking Feller Rd to Old Forest Rd.  Feller Rd was very scenic and that’s where I stopped to take my first pictures of the day.

The weather forecast didn’t call for rain, but with the cooler temperatures and darkening skies, I wondered if that was going to change.

Also along Feller Rd was this old, yet well taken care of cemetery.

I was really enjoying Feller Rd.  I think I only saw one car the whole time I was on this road.  I had been doing very well both days on enjoying the trip instead of focusing on making the next destination.

The mounting headache and hunger reminded me not to dawdle.  Beginning right before my turn on to Old Forest Rd, the road pitched upward.  I had quite the climb to handle, with grades exceeding 15% in spots.  This was on a loaded touring bike, before I had my morning coffee.  This was the first time I considered heading home on a more direct course.

After making the climb, things were just rolling hills.  It was an enjoyable ride with a little traffic into Corydon.

I found the local hotspot for breakfast, Frederick’s Cafe.  It was busy, loud, and cheap.  The coffee was harsh, but had caffeine.  I ate a huge pancake and some eggs.  The food was much better than the coffee.  I did have a picture of the pancake, but due to a technical mishap (I’m an idiot) it’s been lost.

The square in downtown Corydon is quite nice.

After heading out of Corydon on Corydon Ridge Rd again, I continued until Pfrimmer Chapel Rd.  I took this north and crossed over I-64.

I continued north until Crandall-Lanesville Rd, where I turned east.  The skies had cleared up by now.  It never did rain.

Eventually I ended up on Angel Run Rd.  More rolling hills, and some really cool red dirt made this a neat area.  Is this what a terra-formed Mars would look like?

While taking pictures of red dirt, I heard a train approaching.  So I backtracked to the railroad tracks to get a picture.

I rode through Georgetown.  I didn’t even see a store worth stopping at.  IN-64 was a mess to ride on, even for a few blocks through town.

I eventually found my way north on Kepley Rd.  Although I saw this sign, I never saw the cattle.

Kepley Rd became Carter Rd.  There were no serious climbs, but just rolling hills in a peaceful area.

Carter Rd ended at a T on John Pectol Rd.  The road was closed to the left, which was my intended route.

I’m not one to let a simple barricade stop me, so I went around the pile-o-rocks and continued.  Apparently the road has been closed for some time.  Nature was attempting to reclaim the land.  It was peaceful in an eerie kind of way.

I eventually came to a bridge over Big Indiana Creek.  The bridge is closed with barriers.  I wasn’t going to lift my loaded bike over the barriers, but I was able to lay it down and slide it under.  I got across to the other side, where I car was parked – someone fishing I assume – and grabbed another picture.  The road becomes Buttontown Rd at this point.  There’s a bit more traffic here also.

There’s a cemetery at the intersection of Buttontown Rd and Old Vincennes Rd.  There was a large shade tree near the road, so I stopped for a rest.  I simply laid down in the grass for about 15 minutes before continuing north to Greenville.

Greenville has a small city park.  They had restrooms with running water.  I was thankful for that, but things were dirty enough that I wasn’t going to fill my water bottles.

I headed north out of Greenville on Pekin Rd.  It’s a small climb out of town.  A kid on a BMX bike told me to be careful going up the hill.  I found that hilarious at the time.

I realized I was running low on water and hadn’t really had a good place to get any.  While riding through a rather suburban part of Pekin Rd, a woman was outside in her driveway washing rocks in a wheelbarrow.  I asked to refill my water bottles, and she cheerfully handed over the hose.  I thanked her and moved on.

I don’t think her neighbor is quite as friendly.

I eventually headed toward Voyles Rd.  I’m entering an area I know, a friend of mine lives nearby outside of Borden.  I think that some of my friend’s wife’s ancestors are buried here.

The town of Borden sits down in a valley, but I was still riding the ridge tops.

Louisville has the big bat.  I found the big paper towel tube.  (Yes, I know it’s a water tower).

I rode past my friend’s house, but he wasn’t home.  I had a nice downhill into the town of Borden.  While there I bought some more snacks at a gas station and refilled my water bottles again.  I took my time and enjoyed the break.  I spoke with several people who were coming and going.

Then came the next big climb.  I was leaving to the north-east on Jackson Rd.  I am familiar with this climb, but had never done it with a touring load.  It shoots up to about a 19% grade before falling back a little to about 13%.  I was prepared and already in my little chain ring.

Here’s a view looking back the way I came.  You can’t really see down in the valley where Borden is, but you can see the hills (knobs as they call them here) on the other side.

Shortly after finishing the climb my chain came apart and spooled unto the ground.  This was the second time I wished I’d headed straight home.

I was carrying a chain tool and spare master link, but they weren’t even necessary, as the chain came apart at the existing master link.  I don’t know why, it’s a new chain.  I spent about ten minutes getting it back together and continued on my way.  Riding along the ridge was rather pleasant.

After a couple of twists and turns, Jackson Rd becomes Bartle Knob Rd.  There was an older house to my left, and the view they must have – that was to my right – from their front door is breathtaking.

Before long, I’ve crossed over “the knobs” and it’s a fast downhill on Bartle Knob Rd.  Toward the end, I slowed enough to get a picture of this neat church.

I continued to Blue Lick Rd which took me past the truck stop, under the freeway, and into Memphis.  There was another old church there.

I was getting close to Charlestown now.  I’m familiar with most of these roads.  I had never seen this end of Fox Rd before.  They apparently are saving sign material for roads with short names.  Waste not, want not.

I rolled into Charlestown.  I stopped at my old house to check on it.  I talked to a former neighbor.  Then I headed toward Charlestown Pizza where I enjoyed a small pizza and some beer.

I headed out of town on High Jackson Rd.  The sun was getting lower in the sky.  I’m glad I had the dyno-powered lights on the bike.

That meant I was casting a long shadow.

I rode to Bethany Rd then crossed Hwy 62 – into the grass as Bethany Rd doesn’t continue.  I rode a few dozen feet to Patrol Rd, then down to Waterline Rd, which is all part of the old ammunition plant, but that section has recently been opened to the public as another way to get to Utica.

There are still many signs of what this land once was.  It may be a lightly-traveled road with forest, but it’s got trains, signs, and fences.

I eventually got to Upper River Rd.  This runs right between the Ohio River and some cliffs that used to be a quarry, and have since been turned into a housing development.

I continued through Utica.  My normal route from here would involve Utica Pike all the way through Jeffersonville, but I turned off through some neighborhoods and made my way to Middle Rd.  This was fortunate as there was a Dairy Queen on Middle Rd.

By the time I left Dairy Queen, it was completely dark.  My last stretch of the ride was flat, urban, and dark.  I got across the river and into Louisville late enough to miss most of the Ironman stuff going on.  I did notice that 3rd street appeared to be blocked from downtown to Old Louisville.  I went down 1st instead.  I arrived home about 10:30pm.

Saturday ended up at 43.9 miles.  I had a much more interesting 87.7 miles on Sunday that brought me up to 131.6 miles for the two-day trip.

I did get tired, but I stopped for rest when that happened.  Some of the steep climbs caused knee pain, even in my lowest gear.  I was able to go as slow as necessary because I had no real deadline.  I never imagined I’d be out until 10:30 on a Sunday night after leaving for the ride on a Saturday morning, but I had allowed the entire day, both days.  That allowed a lot of flexibility.  I hate riding fast to make a deadline.

I packed light for a camping trip, but I have lousy camping equipment.  I’d like to be able to carry cooking supplies and not carry any more weight.  I can probably do that if I replace my tent and sleeping bag.  Those are at least 10 years old.

I’ve learned that putting most of the weight on the rear of the bike, and the big, fluffy, light things on the front works best.  I also need a good way to carry more water.  I wasn’t even in the middle of nowhere like on the Big South Fork trip last year, and I still ran out of water.

I totally enjoyed my weekend.  I wish I could do it every weekend, but weekends are when I usually mow the lawn and take care of other household duties.

This was my route for Sunday:

I talked to my wife and daughter to make sure the dogs would be taken care of, and I headed out about 10:30 Saturday morning.

The weather was gorgeous.  Clear blue skies, mild temperatures, and a light breeze.  I rode through town, over the Second Street Bridge, and said goodbye to Louisville.

The old Colgate clock in Clarksville is neat, even if it’s now abandoned and doesn’t keep proper time.

Some people have compared my Surly LHT to a tank.  I beg to differ.

I headed northwest out of New Albany towards Edwardsville.  I knew the infamous Edwardsville Hill was coming up, but first I waited for a train to pass.  Notice the graffiti.  I’d be gasping later.

Then I began climbing Edwardsville hill in earnest.  It didn’t seem too bad even with my camping load on the bike, but I was still fresh.  I do have to say the the switchbacks are much more fun going downhill though.

The view from the top was definitely worth the climb.

I eventually made my way to Corydon Ridge Rd.  I’d never ridden this road, and I imagined it being very rural and beautiful.  In reality much of it was very suburban.  Some of the road names do evoke the old rural feel it must have had once.

While I took pictures of odd signs, my bike took a nap.

As I continued on Corydon Ridge Rd, it did get more rural.  There were gently rolling hills.

There were neat old barns.

I continued on and eventually made it to Corydon.  I stopped for a late lunch, early dinner at Magdalena’s.  It was good, but with dessert, I spent more than I intended, and they didn’t even have beer.  I did see Butt Drugs nearby though.

There was a guy with a fish net walking through Indian Creek.

I then headed out of town on Old Forest Rd.  The hills to the west became more prominent.

I’m not sure why hay (straw?) needs a “garage”.  You can tell I’m not a farm boy.

After a bunch of climbing, where I was too busy breathing to take pictures, I was running along the top of a ridge.  There were nice views for quite a distance… and yet I had good cell phone reception.

I saw an ass.

While still on Old Forest Rd, I eventually entered Harrison-Crawford State Forest.  It’s fairly obvious when you enter it, as the open fields and farms end, and you truly are in a forest.  It was cooler, shadier, and beautiful.

I stopped to un-hydrate in the woods a bit, and while I was away, my bike fell asleep again.  I can’t say I’m surprised.  It was a peaceful spot.

Old Forest Rd then becomes IN-462 and enters O’Bannon Woods State Park.  The primitive camping isn’t actually in the park, so I turned north on IN-462, and had a wicked-fast downhill to IN-62, where I soon reached the campground.

There was another downhill (on gravel) in the campground taking me down to the Blue River.  I paid just over $8 for a shady, grassy spot and set up the tent.

The ride there was just under 44 miles.  I still had hours until sundown.  I didn’t bring cooking supplies, just snacks that could be eaten as-is.  I brought my Kindle to have something to do.

The campground was far from quiet.  There were rowdy campers not far from me.  Once it got late and they settled down, I could here the distant traffic on I-64.  Overall it was a much better night than doing the same old thing at home.

My route there is shown below.

I had a longer day planned for Sunday.  You’ll have to wait until my next post to see how that went.

Although I can’t complain about the weather compared to what Pondero has gotten in Texas recently, we’ve still had a heatwave.  It seems to have ended this week.  We won’t be seeing 90 again for a while.  It’s been in the high 70s on the ride into work.  I love it!

Kristy signed a lease, and will be moving out soon.  This is both a relief, and scary at the same time.  I thought I spent enough time living alone after my first divorce, but I guess not.  Living alone will be hard, but necessary.

I’ve been riding the recumbent a lot.  It’s my main commuting machine due to my neck issues.  I still ride my other bikes though.  I pulled the single-speed out of the basement today.  It’s got issues with the freewheel, so I flipped it over to fixed gear.  The short ride I took felt very different.  I may commute on it that way a few times.

I’m in a strange spot.  I was ready to look for a new job a few months ago.  Now, I tolerate the job, and need to cope with everything else.  I’ve been more productive at work, and less productive at home.  <sigh>  I wish it were easier.

I do feel like I’m getting closer to being in control.  I also know that something else could come out of the blue….  I guess I cope my riding.  It’s my escape.

What am I waiting for?

I have a lot of changes coming.  My daughter is moving out of the house tomorrow.  My wife moves out in a few weeks.  There are plans in place to get ride of the house in Charlestown.  I’ll be selling my truck before the end of the year.

What’s that got to do with it?

Nothing, but mentally I seem incapable of handling too much at once.  So I’m waiting.  Not a great reason, but it’ll have to do.

What now?

My neck problem improved dramatically for a while, then started to get a little worse.  I’m going to start commuting on the recumbent again for a while, and save riding upright bikes for group rides, or gravel stuff, or whatever.

Miles!

My June mileage was horrible.  Due to my neck issues I rode only 110 miles.  July was better, but still a bit off, at 363 miles.  Back in March I rode 647 miles.

I met up with Tim this morning for a short-ish ride.  I ended up with 35 miles for the day.  I was happy with that.  I brought my camera with me, but never took a picture.

Where am I heading?

I’ll be car-free by the end of the year.  I will hopefully be back on track for weight loss.  I should be weighing myself again soon.

I will hopefully pull myself together enough mentally to be happy with what I have, rather than obsess with what I want.  I’ll still want things, I just don’t want to obsess over them.

• I ride a bike almost everywhere
• I go out to eat often and overeat when I do
• I drink beer several times a week
• I gain weight
• I suffer from depression

Maybe it’s time to not be normal.  I want to lose more weight and be healthier and happier.

I do have one change coming that I’m not quite sure of my feelings about.  Kristy and I are splitting up.  I’m not going to go into details except to say that we still love each other, but we rushed into marriage.  I’ll miss her, but I’m glad she’ll still be around town.

The question is, will that help me to focus on my goals, or push me toward beer, food, and self-loathing even more?

She won’t be moving out for another six weeks (give or take).  Once she does, I’ll work toward some of my simple living goals, which should help me determine what is important in my life.

Relationships are hard.  This failure has taught me things and will hopefully give me focus for the future.

I’m leaving work early tomorrow to get my first epidural.  My wife is meeting me there, as I’m not supposed to drive home.  I was going to drive to work, then out to my appointment, but I’ve decided to ride my bike.  The ride to work is easy, but the ten mile ride from work to the doctor’s office is on some busy roads.  (Shelbyville Rd out to the Oxmoor for you locals).  I’m going to do it out of principle.  My wife will still meet me there for the trip home.

There’s a sub-group of the LBC that approached us at RCCS about a populaire, kind of like a Brevet but shorter, and possibly less organized.  :)  There’s one coming up this Saturday and I’m making tentative (health depending) on attending.  It’s 100K (62 miles).  I’m not too worried about the distance.  I’m more worried about what kind of pace I can manage.

The 'bent with new brakes

I still hurt, but things have improved.  I’m back to riding my bike, even if I have to limit myself to the recumbent.  I had been taking a medication that did little good, but made me zombie-like.  I have discontinued the medication.

Yesterday was one of my most “normal” days since this all started.  ”Normal” is a very relative thing.

I took the ‘bent to Bluegrass Bicycle to upgrade the disc brakes to the much better Avid BB7 set.  First impressions are good but not mind-blowing.  Maybe my mind is gone, therefore cannot be blown.

This neck issue has really been a problem for over a month now.  It has seriously affected my bike riding.  Here’s hoping I’m coming out of that, even if it requires another bike.

Longer-term relief is (hopefully) in the works, then maybe I’ll be able to ride my other bikes.

Basically, I have an issue with a disc in my cervical spine.  I also have a bone spur.  It’s putting pressure on a nerve that runs through my shoulder and arm.  I don’t know much more than that.

My next appointment is with a neurosurgeon.  Yes, that means that surgery is probably coming soon.  What does all of this mean?

Bicycling

I rode my single-speed to work yesterday.  It was painful enough that my wife picked me up from work.  I drove to work today.

I’ll be picking up the ‘bent with new brakes on Saturday, but even riding that is going to be limited.  I’ll ride short rides here and there, but I’m pretty much done with the bike for the year.  :(

Weight

This is a wake-up call.  I’ve been gaining weight for a while, but this new bout of being sedentary could be bad.  I’m getting strict with my eating, now.

What’s Next?

A temporary measure to ease the pain until my appointment with the neurosurgeon involves a needle stuck into my neck.  That hasn’t been scheduled yet, but it could give some temporary relief.  After meeting with the neurosurgeon in about a month, I’ll know what I’m up against.

Goals

I need some goals, just so I can envision and end to this mess.  I’m still going to have to think about it more, but I do need another lifestyle change.  I need to get back to healthier eating.  I need to lose more weight.

Once the pain is better, I need some new mileage goals.  I need to start some strength training.

I’m trying to stay positive.  Nothing feels positive, but I’m working to change that.

I spent the entire three days laying bed.

When I woke up Saturday, my right shoulder/neck/upper back/right arm area was extremely sore.  I thought maybe I had just slept wrong.  Just thinking about riding a bike made me hurt.

As the day went on, it got worse.  I had been up moving around the house.  I took a shower.  I continued to get worse.  It was major pain that made doing anything impossible.  I couldn’t sit in a chair.  I couldn’t stand up for long.  Laying in bed with my right arm over my head was the only thing that eased the pain a little.

I had little sleep on Friday night.  Laying in bed during the day naturally led to falling asleep.  Sleeping though agonizing pain is a great thing… when you can do it.  I slept most of Saturday.

When evening came, I knew I’d be in trouble.  I figured I wouldn’t be able to sleep.  I was wrong.  I slept though the night and into mid-morning Sunday.

I had been taking an anti-inflammatory to combat the pain.  It had a limited effect.

Sunday was slightly better, but I was still mostly bed-ridden.  I didn’t sleep the day away, but read several books on my Kindle.

Sunday night sucked.  I was in too much pain.  I kept my wife up with my bitching and moaning.

Today (Monday) started bad, but got better toward the evening.  I read another book on the Kindle.

By evening I was able to sit at the computer for brief periods.  I hauled my recumbent bike out of the basement and prepared it for tomorrow’s commute.  Riding an upright bike is out of the question right now.

What caused this?  I have a few ideas.  I have arthritis in my right shoulder.  I have an mostly-constant stiff neck.  The two are probably related.

Last Saturday (the 21st) I rode 94 miles on my LHT to Danville.  My neck had been bothering me before the trip.  On Sunday I rode another 42 miles.  I also commuted on an upright bike every day.

When riding a road bike you actually have to tilt your head backward to see straight ahead.  I think I strained a muscle in there somewhere.  I believe it’s causing a pinched nerve.

I have an appointment with my doctor in about a week.  In the meantime I’m going to try to see a chiropractor.  I’ve never been to a chiropractor before, but this is way beyond what a massage therapist can handle.

I sent a text to Tim, and he rode his Ute up to join me.

We talked bikes.  We watched the people walking up and down Bardstown Rd.  We couldn’t stay long, we both had to work in the morning.  I had a few more beers than he did.

Waking today was rough.  The fact that I showered, rode to work, and made it on time despite the hangover is a testament to it being a great day.

The beautiful Spring weather is here, possibly temporarily.  It was sunny and in the mid-60s when I left this morning.  I was wearing my work clothes and didn’t immediately notice that I forgot my helmet.  I didn’t bother turning around for it when I did realize it.

Human power?

The commute home was pleasant.  It was clear and warm.  People were friendly.  When I was nearly home I saw my daughter riding her bike the other way.  We stopped and talked.  She was riding to the library to check out some books.  She invited me to come along, but I had things to do at home.

There is rain in the forecast, so I wanted to get the lawn mowed.  I needed more gasoline for the lawnmower.  I grabbed the gas can and walked a couple of blocks to the gas station.  At $3.89 per gallon it cost me about $10.50 to fill up the can.

There was a rumor at the gas station that the price would be $4.01 by tomorrow morning.

$10.50?

I’m glad I rarely buy gas.

My daughter called me from the library.  She was approached by David Morse, from CART (and he helps Bicycling For Louisville).  He’s photographing bicyclists in town.  He grabbed a couple of photos for his project.  He did share them with me later.

Dawn - still new at this cycling thing

Later when Dawn got back from the library, the two of us took the dogs for a walk down to Sunergos.  It was really too late (and a bit warm) for me to want coffee, but I did have an iced drink.

My dogs are overweight and out of shape.  The last stretch on the way home really did them in.  They’ll sleep well tonight.

Overall it was a good day.  It was better than many and great for a Monday.

Tomorrow will be a different adventure.  There is a 50% chance of thunderstorms.  I actually enjoy riding in a storm as long there’s no hail and the temperature is warm enough.

I haven’t been talking much about weight recently.  I don’t have much to write about.  I haven’t been controlling my diet.  I haven’t been weighing regularly.  I haven’t been losing (or gaining) weight.  My weigh has been steady at just above 220 lbs.  That’s quite a bit above my goal weight of 175.

I started this adventure at nearly 300 lbs and very unfit.  I had a sedentary lifestyle.  I was probably on the fast-track to a heart attack.

I was able to bring my weight under 200 lbs for a while.  I also got much more fit.  That took a lot of effort and self-control.  I still intend to work at that, I’m not giving up my goal weight yet.

One thing has changed.  My bicycle-centric lifestyle means I can maintain a weight around 220 lbs without much effort.  I drink beer and eat pizza with few limits.  I don’t eat fast food or drink soda, but that’s because I don’t enjoy those things.  Parting with them wasn’t difficult.

Maybe I’m just making excuses for not putting the effort into losing more weight.  I want to do some more bike touring this year.  I want to have more free time away from work and family obligations, but I’m not sure how to pull that one off.

I had planned another ride today, but I really needed to sleep in.  Now I have domestic duties around the house, and very little energy.

I crawled out of bed about 10 minutes ago.  I’m stiff and sore.  I still need to make some coffee.

It seems almost a crime to waste the weather today.  It’s supposed to get up into the 70s.  Maybe I’ll squeeze in a one-hour ride later.  Coffee, breakfast, and housework need to come first.

Riding a bike and other exercise left me tired enough to sleep, and I got into better habits.  My wife’s schedule has sometimes interfered with that.  Well, it should help now.  She now leaves the house at 3:45am.  I get up sometime between 3:00 and 4:00 unless I oversleep.

On Tuesday, I was up early, and left the house early enough to take the long way to work.  Yesterday, I overslept and <<shudder>> drove to work.

I got up at 3:00 today.  That gives me plenty of time to read email, make coffee (I started drinking coffee again), make breakfast, possibly write a blog post, and ride a few extra miles.

If I can fully get my body into this early morning thing, it’ll be nice.  Mornings are quiet and peaceful.  Traffic is still light if I head out early enough.

This trip happened because of Debbie’s idea.  She wanted to ride to Indianapolis.  She later couldn’t do the first half of the trip for her own reasons, but she planted the seed in my head.

I learned a few things from this ride.

Don’t bring too much. I was overloaded. I wasn’t even camping, but I was probably carrying 50 lbs.  I was carrying a laptop, but I needed to in case work needed to.  I probably wouldn’t do this on a camping tour.  I brought too many clothes.  I should only bring two sets of cycling clothes, one to wear while the other is getting washed or dried.  One set of street clothes and some raingear would have rounded out the clothing needs.  I had cycling gear for four days, street clothes, and several sets of socks and underwear.  I also had a sweater with me that I never wore.

Put some weight on the front. If you are camping, and are going need to carry a lot of gear, spread the load out between front and rear.  I had all the weight on the rear.  This normally worked, but during steep climbs in low gear, the front wheel would sometimes lift.  It wasn’t a huge issue, but could have been better.

Riding alone and riding with someone are different, and each has it’s advantages. I rode 30 miles with Michael.  I rode 120 miles with Debbie.  The remaining 130 miles were solo.  Riding solo is less hurried, less worry about what others think.  It’s quiet enough to lose yourself in thought.  It can also get lonely.  Riding with someone gives you someone to share the experience with, even if you don’t discuss much of it.  I will continue to ride solo and with others on tour.  I like both for different reasons.

Bicycling touring is a great way to talk to strangers. There’s something about being on a loaded-down touring bike that will get people talking to you.  There was an older couple at a restaurant in Salem that wanted to know about my trip.  An old man in Indianapolis at a downtown bar who discussed bicycling lifestyle (he’s car-free).  The woman working the desk at the Motel 6 was quite fascinated by our trip.  People are genuinely curious about what you are doing and why.

There’s a lot of time required off the bike. Finding food, resting, sleeping, checking into motels and/or camping all take time.   Packing/unpacking the bike is time-consuming.  You also need to leave time to talk to random strangers and friends alike.  I initially was too aggressive with my per-day mileage and had no time.  Luckily, I saved 30 miles when Michael picked me up in Bedford and took me to his place in Bloomington.  That gave us time to go our for dinner (and excellent beer).  On the last day of the trip, after arriving at Debbie’s house, she saved me another 30 miles by driving me home.  This allowed me to spend more time with my wife and daughter before having to go to work the next day.

Related to time is mileage. You won’t go fast when touring.  It’s not a race.  My average speeds were probably just under 10mph.  Trying to ride 110 miles on the first day was a mistake.  I rode 80 miles on the first two days, and 60 on the other two.  I should have tried to stay under 60.  That would have meant a longer (time-wise) tour, but I’ll plan for that next time.

Enjoy the trip, not the destination. Or as Pondero asked, “Have you been able to transition from destination obsession to enjoying the moment that touring affords?”  I think having a pre-set route for each day caused me to have “destination obsession”.  I knew that flexibility is best, but hotel stays, a host in Bloomington, and meeting up with another rider made it hard to be flexible.  I did enjoy the trip, but I was always looking forward to arriving at my destination.  I need to work on that.  I also need a longer tour to be more flexible.

It takes time to adjust to normal life. I didn’t think this would be an issue for me after only five days, but it was.  Going back to work was hard.  Cleaning house and other mundane chores just felt wrong.  I wanted to be out on the roads again.  I’m not sure what will happen after 30 days on tour.  Will I never be able to come home?

Most people are polite. Most bicycling forums, mailings lists, and random talk from friends paints the picture of the cager, an asshole wrapped in his metal shell.  There are a lot of drivers out there.  I took low-traffic roads when I could, but around cities it’s impossible to avoid the traffic.  I was passed by thousands of cars over four days of riding.  Nearly all of them drove politely near me.  On the way to Indianapolis, I had zero honks or screams.  There were a couple of close passes and impatient drivers, but they were in the minority.  On the return trip, it was during the week, and had a couple of honks and one yell, but again, the rudeness was very much the minority.  This was true even on US36 in Indianapolis or US50 in Seymour.

Sunblock is a necessity, even in March.  I had intended to bring my sunblock, but couldn’t find it.  I didn’t bother buying more, because it’s March and the weather forecast called for clouds.  Although everyday had a cloudy stretch, each also had sun.  I had sunburn on my neck and ears.

I want to plan my next tour already. I have this “head in the clouds” thing since getting home.  I want to go on a longer tour.  Maybe to Nashville now.  Across the country in a year or two.  I wish I had the time and money.

I need to get out and ride more often. Since moving into town, I don’t have a quick and easy 11-mile loop.  I need to come up with one, even though it would now be urban rather than rural.  I’m comfortable in traffic, so an urban route isn’t a problem.  I’ve been so fixated on bicycling for transportation, that riding everyday is nice, but I seldom ride during the week except for commuting or errands.  Maybe that will ease some of the yearning for the next tour.

I love my GPS. Some old-school tourers may say a map is all you need, but I’m directionally challenged, and the GPS was a godsend.  I understand the value of having maps also, but for easy routing without having to stop and pull out a map, the GPS did a wonderful job.  It worked for keeping me on track and finding detours when necessary.

Why tour? It’s not just about the bike riding.  There are a lot of reasons.  Meeting new people and seeing new places is often cited, but I don’t think it’s the primary reason.  Getting away is my reason.  Most of us need time alone.  Whether we are truly alone, or touring with someone else, it’s a good time to reflect on life, yourself., and the world.  You can process your past, plan your future, and enjoy the present while just turning the pedals around.

More Pictures? Why yes, I do have more.  Below are links to my Picasa Web Albums for each day of riding.  Each photo is geotagged so you see where I was when it was taken.

Saturday, March 19th
Sunday, March 20th
Tuesday, March 22nd
Wednesday, March 23rd

I was over-commited on time, and it stressed me out.  I dropped out of the triathlon, and any other competitive riding.  I’ll write in this blog when I feel like it, rather it being a chore.

I’ve worried that this blog is seriously off-topic.  I almost never write about anything other than bicycles now, but it’s my blog, and cycling is a huge part of my life now.

Anyway.  I own to sets of panniers.  A small cheap set, and a larger cheap set.  Neither has a great attachment mechanism.

The small set had a major zipper malfunction a couple of months ago.  It’s still usable, but I can’t close it all the way.  That set works best on the front rack of my LHT.  I can’t fit my laptop in those panniers, so it’s not the ideal commuting pannier.  Due to the hooking mechanism, I have to use bungie cords to prevent the panniers from falling off.  They have fallen off before.

The larger set has been pretty good to me, until a few days ago.  One of the hooks and other associated hardware fell off and was lost.  I thought I had spare parts, but I can’t seem to find them.

This has made commuting more challenging.  I’m still doing it, but I’d hate to drop the laptop in the road.  I also have a mini-tour coming up later this month.  Having a good set of panniers would really be nice.

My lovely wife bought me an early birthday present.  She ordered a set of the Arkel GT-54 panniers for me.  She really is a wonderful woman.  I’m getting the red ones.  Possibly this week, maybe next week.  I already have a red Arkel Tailrider trunk bag.

Sometime in the future I’ll buy the T-28 front panniers, also in red, to finish the “bike luggage” collection.

I’ve been ignoring the need to train a great deal for swimming.  Swimming is painful due to my shoulder arthritis.

I’ve made the decision to not compete in the triathlon.  Actually, I won’t be competing in anything.  I’m also not going to attempt to race the Tour Divide in 2015 as I initially intended.

The problem, is training.  Training isn’t fun.  Training hurts.  I don’t want to hurt.  It’s just not worth it.  I want to ride my bike and have a good time.

I had been formulating my decision all weekend.  I really didn’t want to talk about it.  I was ashamed.  I was angry with myself.  I posted on BikeForums about it with the subject “I’m a quitter“.  I actually got some really good feedback from the other members.

Quitting would be sitting on your sofa and eating cheese puffs. You’ve just refined your goals.

That made me feel better. I do still want to ride, and I want to ride a huge number of miles. I want to lose more weight, and stay fit. I want to go on a tour.

Life’s too short to do things you hate. Go out and ride, tour, randonnee, ride around the neighborhood….whatever. Do what you enjoy.

+1 on what everyone else said. Do what makes you happy. You’re still exercising and improving yourself by riding recreationally instead of training to race. I don’t blame you one bit for not wanting to do that stuff anymore. I tried it during the first half of 1993 for mountain bike racing. It was mostly fun at first and I did pretty well, but when it came time to upgrade from the Beginner class the fun was over. It became the kind of sufferfest I DON’T like, and not worth it to me. I’d rather suffer on my own terms.

I mentioned that Kent Peterson was my inspiration for attempting the Tour Divide in 2015.

The thing to realize is that Kent is a mutant. I mean that in the nicest way possible; I’ve ridden with him and he’s a really nice guy, great advocate for cycling, etc. But he’s in a class above most when it comes to riding.
He’s one of those guys that can survive on little to no sleep. He can fuel himself on garbage. No, really… we’re talking about a guy whose personal slogan is “Not A Nutritional Role Model”. He’s done a 1200k fueled on little more than Payday bars and Starbucks. He can ride for hundreds of miles on trail mix and peanut M&M’s. He won the Raid Californie-Oregon (1200k from SF to PDX, fixies only) then rode the additional 200 miles back to Seattle so he could go to work. By his own admission, he doesn’t beleive in “training” either. When you ride 12,000/year you really don’t need to do anything additional as training.
Most of us, with the right training, could finish a race like the Tour Divide or a 1200k brevet. Some people, like Kent, Vinnie M (over 40,000k RUSA distance last year), and Mark T (4x 1200k events last year) just have a different natural ability for the sport, and structured training doesn’t play much into their routines.

I’m of the attitude that if it’s not fun anymore, then why do it?

I know I don’t need the approval of others to make these decisions, but it did make me feel more comfortable with it after the fact.  I’ve disappointed at least two people by doing this, but I want to ride a bike not run and swim also.

Doing and Being are closely related and can lead to a fulfilling life.  Having can make you a slave to fashion/posessions/marketing/consumption.

The lines aren’t always clear-cut.  You need to Have certain things to Do certain things.  The difference is in your primary focus.

I ran another race last Saturday, the Reindeer Romp 4k.  It was originally scheduled to be before the 5k I did a while ago, but it was rescheduled to to weather.  I did run a bit better pace (26:54 for the run, 10:49 per mile), but I was incredibly sore after the ride.

Running in general just seems like a bad idea for my body.  I have issues with my knees and hips when running.  I also end up sore all over the next day.  I do get a stronger endorphin buzz from running than cycling, but I’m not sure if it’s worth it.  I don’t enjoy running much at all.  I sort of enjoy the first hour or so after a run though.

My shoulder arthritis has flared up again.  I’m not sure of the cause.  That started to cut into my bike riding, until I got the recumbent out again.  I can ride the recumbent without aggravating the shoulder, but now it’s causing knee pain.  It may be I need to readjust the seat.  I’ve actually gained a little weight since I last rode it regularly.

I took (yet another) break from the YMCA.  Spin class really hurts.  Swimming aggravates my shoulder.

The real question is am I pushing myself too far?  I’m seriously considering dropping out of the triathlon training.  I don’t want to.  Completing a triathlon would be really cool.  It’s still the swimming I’m most worried about though.

I should know in a few more days or weeks.

I still felt like I was muddling through everything, but it’ll pass.  I’m glad today is Friday.  I’m taking Monday off (picking Kristy up at the airport) so the three-day weekend will allow me to completely recover.

I drove to work on Monday because I was sick.  I drove to work today because I had no motivation to do much of anything.  After work today, I barely had the motivation to drive home.  I could have slept in my office.

I did push myself to go grocery shopping.  It really did take pushing myself to accomplish that.  Ugh.  I need to cook tonight, but I’m not sure I’m going to.  I may just have a peanut butter sandwich and call it a night.

My bike mileage for the month is going to be lousy.  I was hoping for 500 miles, but I’m not much over 300.  I don’t have anything big planned for this weekend.  I need to recover.  I need to clean the house.  I am going to help Andy Dyson from Bicycling for Louisville move tomorrow.  He’s invited area bicyclist to help him move… by bicycle.  It won’t be many miles.  Both his current and future residences are very close to me.

No more coffee. My coffee consumption has skyrocketed.  I seldom brew my own, I go to the coffee shop and end up buying snacks while I’m there.  It’s hurting my weight loss effort, and my wallet.  I’ll drink water and milk.

Very little eating out. I guess it’s a mental thing where I feel like I have to treat myself.  I’ve been doing it too often, and it’s causing problems.  I need to pack a lunch when I go to work, and cook dinner at night.

Very little beer.  I love beer.  It’s something I treat myself with, usually when going out for dinner.

No ice cream. I haven’t had any recently, but if it’s in the house, I’ll eat the whole container.  Kristy will be home soon, and probably bring some in the house.  If the allowed amount is none, it should be easier for me.

Changing weight-tracking. I’m still weighing daily, even if I haven’t updated the page here in a while.  I’m no longer going to post daily weights.  I’ll change the weigh-in page to be weekly averages.  Then maybe I’ll be able to keep posting regularly.

I did mention some exceptions to the changes.  I may occasionally violate one of the rules during social functions.  This could include an RCCS coffee ride, pub crawl, whatever.  If I ride a 40-mile round-trip to have pizza and beer, that’s okay.

I won’t be training this week, but I will be back at the YMCA on Sunday.  It’s time to get in gear again.  After the triathlon in July, I’m going to re-attempt switching to a paleo-diet.  I tried before, but I felt like crap when I didn’t eat carbs.  I’ve since learned that it takes 2-3 weeks to adjust.

We had a good turnout.  A total of seven of us arrived in Holland IN for the ride start.  With the snow on the ground, mountain bikes were pretty much required.  I don’t own a mountain bike, so the LHT had to fill that duty.  I had the studded tires on which worked great on the icy patches near the beginning of the ride.

The route was beautiful.  The terrain was lovely.  The road surfaces were horrid.  Once we got away from town, none of the roads had been plowed at all.  The snow was pushed down “two-track” style by car tires.

We headed west out of town.  We kept a reasonable pace, and I felt strong.  I almost felt confident due to the amount of ice, and my studded tires.  As the roads got more snow-covered, it got a little tougher, but I kept a reasonable pace.  After just over four miles, the route headed north.

At about mile 13, my speed dropped considerably, and I knew I was struggling.  It took too much effort to push through the snow.  My brakes were caked with snow and nearly non-functional.  The studded tires had little traction on loose snow.

Also along here somewhere, the five faster riders left Tim and I behind.  Tim and I decided to cut the Winslow portion of the route off and take a shorter route.  We headed south on CR 650E where the others went north.  This was probably a mistake.  I could have used some real food, and a chance to warm up.

This way also took us directly through Ferdinand State Forest, which had the worst road surface we saw.  Looking at the GPS logs, my top speed through that stretch was in the single-digits.

We continued on.  I sometimes stopped to walk the bike when I just couldn’t get traction.  I was completely out of energy.

We finally made it to SR64.  The road was clear, and I wanted to take it as far as possible toward Holland.  Tim was thinking a little clearer, and didn’t like the 55 mph speed limit, high-traffic highway, and directed us on SR257 instead, which wasn’t as clear, but had little traffic.  After some distance on SR257, the other five riders came up behind us.

We rode together to the tiny town of Stendal and regroup and took a few photos.  I was done.  I wasn’t going any farther.  There was an (out of business) general store with a bench out front.  Despite the cold temperatures, I sat on the bench and announced that I couldn’t ride anymore.  They tried to convince me to continue to avoid getting too cold, but I was adamant.

After only 34.5 miles, I had bailed on the ride.  I was disgusted with myself.  Maybe I was coming down sick (that’s actually possible, had a rough day today).  Maybe I just had the wrong bike for the ride (that certainly contributed).  Maybe I was just having an off day (like the spin class I ditched after 10 minutes).  Maybe I’ve been training too hard for the triathlon and wore myself out.

I’m still glad I rode.  The scenery was beautiful.  I managed to dress well for the temperatures.  I even survived sitting on that stupid bench with only a small amount of shivering.

More on Tim’s blog and on the RCCS blog.