Tim, Mark, and I worth the three people that showed up for last night’s RCCS Brew Cruise.
I rode my Dahon folding bike to avoid having to lock up. I ended up with it locked to Tim and Mark’s bikes for most of the stops, but I did carry it into BBC Taproom. The other establishments were packed, and I wouldn’t want it to get in the way.
My previous post was quite negative. I’ve been fighting off frustration with many things in live, and dealing with depression. Luckily bicycling has made me feel better about myself, and introduced me to many new people. I now consider some of those people friends.
I now have a social life again, due to the bicycle.
I just deleted a post. I almost published it. I would have pissed a lot of people off. I would have given away more personal information that I really want to. Yes, it was quite negative.
I’m under a lot of stress. I have a physical issue that is causing me pain. I hate certain aspects of my life and my job. Changing jobs won’t fix it. The problem is me. I don’t know how to fix me.
I’m not losing it. I’ll get up tomorrow, ride my bike to work, then join Tim and others for an RCCS beer ride after work.
I need to quit reading the news. Maybe being ignorant would be better. I definitely need to quit reading most public forums.
I wish I could opt-out of society. If I weren’t married, I would cut the cord for phone and internet. If someone wanted to communicate with me, they’d have to come knock on my door. How quaint.
Okay, this post has become almost as bad as the original, but with less personal information. ’nuff said.
Due to recent travelling, I haven’t done much riding. It was really starting to get to me.
I did ride on Sunday with Tim. I’ll write about that and share some pictures soon.
I intended to ride to work yesterday. I headed out the door on my LHT shortly before 7:00 am and made it less than two miles before my chain broke. Discouraged, I called my wife to come get me, and changed into work clothes, and drove.
In addition to getting a new chain for the bike, I made a second, spur of the moment, purchase at another bike shop. I bought a Brooks Professional saddle to replace my sagging Brooks B-17.
Barge on the river
I hit the road this morning at 6:30 am, and took the long way through Utica to get to work. I stopped at a coffee shop along the way. It was nearly 22 miles one-way.
The hot weather has passed. It was about 63 degrees when I left the house. It was very comfortable weather with clear skies. I couldn’t have asked for a better commute to work. I may stay sane after all.
I’m sitting in the hotel in DC between sessions. My flight home leaves later this afternoon. It’ll be good to be in my own bed with my wife. It’ll be good to see the dogs again.
My eating on this trip could have been better, but I still did much better than the old Dave that I used to be. That Dave would have eaten several plates at each meal. I generally had normal size meals. I did have some unnecessary snacks. I had a few beers. I haven’t exercised at all. I could have, there is a fitness center here. I’ll still be eating lunch here, and probably getting something to eat at the airport, but I’ll keep it light.
I’ve been thinking a lot about re-focusing on the fitness and weight loss. I have gotten fatter. I hate having a gut that hangs over my belt. At one point, I was well on my way to not having it.
There will (probably) be a fun bike ride tomorrow. There will be drinking, so it’s not a healthy ride, but I will practice moderation and make the purpose of the ride social rather than enjoying too much food and beer.
After that, I’ll probably go some time without beer. I also need to clean up my eating again. I need to avoid ice cream completely. During my weight loss, I was able to limit myself to a single scoop of ice cream. Every time I’ve had ice cream recently, I’ve had entirely too much. I’m not sure why I have less self-control than I use to.
EDIT: Nasty weather has cancelled my flight, and a bunch of others. I’m stuck in DC for another night. I really hate air travel.
I stopped weighing myself a while back. My weight had been mostly holding steady, but I have noticed that my gut is bigger. I think the lack of upper-body workouts in combination with poor eating is leading me to lose muscle and gain fat. So, yes, sometimes the scale lies.
I’m sitting in the Louisville airport waiting to fly to DC via Cleveland. I have a work-related conference to attend. They will provide (too much) food. I need to control my portion sizes.
I’m not bringing a bike with me. Without riding, I should be able to get by with very little food. When I get home I’ll concentrate on eating right again, re-start the food-diary (again), and start weighing myself again. I’m also going to start using my dumbbells and doing push-ups.
The hotel I’ll be staying at has a fitness center, and I am bringing proper exercise attire, so I should be able to squeeze some time in on the weight machines.
My goal weight is still 175. My lack of progress has been maddening and a bit depressing. I’ve used being busy as an excuse to not eat right. That needs to change.
I’m taking the rest of the week off of work. My wife and I are driving to West Virginia to see her family.
There go my bicycle commuter miles for the week. I’m planning on throwing my folding bike behind the seat, but I’m not sure how much time I’ll have for riding.
When I get back, I may, or may not make a one-day trip to Michigan and back on Saturday, then fly to Washington DC on Sunday.
I haven’t been on the bike enough recently. I’ve been riding the new folder on short rides, but that’s about it. The month of July was set to be a record mileage month, but not now.
My numb hand is back to normal. I rode the LHT into work today with the stock saddle. My poor Brooks saddle is sagging and causes numbness. The stock saddle wasn’t great, but didn’t cause numbness.
Now that I’ve ridden the LHT almost 40 miles for the day, I know that I still have fit issues. I tweaked the saddle position some, and rotated the handlebars forward. I’m going to ride again tomorrow and see how much improvement there is.
Not riding to work causes me stress. It’s weird. I drove to work every day for many years. I even had a hellish 35-mile one-way commute for a couple of years. Yet I felt that sitting in the car with creature comforts made it okay. I don’t feel that way anymore. I don’t like throwing away money on gas, parking, and car maintenance. I don’t like gaining weight.
I do like the fresh air, sunrise, weather (except headwinds), adrenaline rush, and the overall alive feeling I get when riding my bike to work. It gives me something to look forward to twice a day.
I’ve been riding a lot of miles. I broke a few records on Sunday. I’ve ridden two centuries in a little over a month. I hit 3000 miles of cycling for the year during my commute today. I’m well on track to get 5000+ miles for the year.
The depression that was really affecting me earlier this year has gone away. I’m sure it’ll come back again some day, and I’ll have to cope. Overall, I’ve been feeling really good recently.
Bad Stuff
My eating has been crazy. It’s partially from being hungry from riding. It’s partially due to treating myself to beer, pizza, ice cream, steak, and similiar items much too often.
I haven’t had any real weight loss since March of 2009! That sickens me. I know weight is just a number, but I still have a gut. I feel like I’m way too fit for this gut. I’ve got to lose the gut. Damn the gut!
I’m having comfort issues on my newest bike, Surly Sue, the LHT. Although I’ve ridden two 100-miles rides on that bike, the recent rides have left me with possible ulnar nerve issues in my left hand. I also have some saddle issues to figure out. As such, I’m riding Oria, my recumbent, more often, as there is no pressure on the hands. I will get a bike fit to help get comfortable again, but in the meantime it’s nice to have another option.
What’s Next?
I’m trying to get my eating under control. I had started my “food diary” back up a while ago, but that didn’t last long. I need to track what I eat.
I’ve decided that I need a fast bike. Both my current bikes are designed to be comfortable for hauling stuff long distances. Neither is really designed to be fast. After much thought, I think my fast bike will be a recumbent. Probably a Bacchetta Strada. It won’t be until at least next year until I can afford one, but that’s the plan.
I seem to be over the strep now. I have a feeling that I’ll have no more symptoms sometime tomorrow.
Unfortunately, normal for me usually means my wife is out of town. That will be true again. I’ll be taking her to the airport early tomorrow morning before work.
So, mostly alone, body healed… It’s time to ride some miles. :)
I’m taking the recommended medications, but I feel shaky, weak, and feverish. This really sucks. Swallowing (even my own saliva) is torture. I’ve had strep throat before, but I don’t remember it being this bad.
I’ve been unable to sleep much at all. I ate very little yesterday, and limited myself to soup, ice cream, and popsicles today.
This damn bacteria set up shop in the back of my throat and is trying to poison me. In addition, my own body is making me miserable while fighting the bacteria.
I felt better mentally after finding out that this was strep, and having a plan to get rid of it. Now I’ve been suffering with it long enough that it’s affecting my mood badly.
The thought of riding my bike is comical. I don’t even want to step outside. Actually, I’d rather not be inside either. I want to be able to sleep through this.
Hopefully I’ll feel better tomorrow, and I’ll quit whining.
I had a wonderful time on my Monday and Tuesday adventure. I was quite sore on Wednesday, so I drove to work.
Today, I forced myself to get on the bike. Once I was rolling, it was worth it. I took the recently re-opened Waterline Rd on my ride to work. It’s a peaceful wooded stretch of road and I rarely see a car. I did see two turtles on the road.
I wasn’t feeling up to riding home after work, but I really didn’t have good options. Traffic was bad. Drivers were rude. I really felt for a while that the world isn’t meant for people anymore, but instead is made for cars.
I pulled into a parking lot, walked over to some grass, and just sat down and enjoyed the feel of the grass. I was a bit farther from the road now, so the traffic noise was more distant. I thought about napping, but figured it would be a bad idea. After drinking some water and reflecting on where I’ve been recently, I suddenly felt much better.
I hopped on the bike and the rest of the ride home was awesome.
Friday morning was a mess. I had been woken up several times by emergency phone calls from work. We had some network issues that required my time. I didn’t get enough sleep, so I drove to work on Friday, as I had Thursday. I did manage to ride my bike to work on Monday through Wednesday though.
Saturdays are often a good day to sleep in. I was awoken early this morning by a thunderstorm. After falling back asleep I was awoken again by a phone call from work at 6:00 a.m. Our website was offline. A quick check revealed all internal stuff was functional, so it was the web hosting company. A few phone calls later everything was resolved.
The thunderstorm had passed, I still hadn’t had my morning coffee, but I really needed to clear my head to prevent a bad mood from ruining the day. My lovely wife called and suggested I ride my bike. So I did.
I headed out on my 11-mile loop. It was still raining lightly when I left, but it stopped pretty early into the ride. I wasn’t in a hurry. It wasn’t a training ride. I just wanted to relax. So I took almost an hour to ride the 11 miles, then rode to the coffee shop to get my caffeine fix.
I’m now home, and things are looking up! The sky in mostly sunny and blue, the temperatures are warming up, and I’ll be watching my youngest daughter at her high-school graduation ceremony tonight.
Last Saturday I rode a Century. I rode my bike to work and back 4 out of five days this week (I overslept on Thursday). Most days this week were calling for rain, but I avoided it each time, other than a few sprinkles.
My commuting for the week racked up 140.5 miles on the bike. I’m not doing any big rides this weekend. I may not ride at all. I have a lot of “domestic” stuff to do.
Depression
I’ve had a depression issue for most of this year. It lifted mysteriously on Thursday, May 27th. I’ve been almost giddy ever since until yesterday (the day I didn’t ride) and my mood darkened. I rode again today, and things are well again.
Does riding fix the depression? Is the cause more subtle than that? I don’t know. I do know that it’s hard to get on the bike when I’m depressed.
Diet
I’ve been eating better, other than Wednesday where I went out for lunch, and again for dinner. I overate to the point of discomfort at dinner. I hate it when that happens.
Weight
My weight is still bobbing around between 200 and 210. It may linger there forever, but I now know that I must monitor my weight regularly and watch what I eat for the rest of my life. This isn’t negotiable. If I fail to do this, I will gain every pound back.
My goal weight is still 175. It may take a long time to get there. It seemed to be in striking distance at one point, but the loss has stalled.
That’s not the way I did things. I started with the diet, then exercise, now I’m hoping to lose more weight, but trying not to gain more.
When I started this adventure my BMI was about 41. Standard medical procedure for someone like me would have been gastric bypass. I’m glad I didn’t go that route. I rather like having a complete GI tract. My BMI is now about 28, which is still considered overweight, but I would no longer be considered for surgery, and that is a very good thing.
What Now?
I got a bit lazy after losing 100lbs. I started to indulge in the foods I love. I thought I could still do it, because I’d already lost weight, and because I ride my bike… a lot!
Well, that’s not the case. I went two months without weighing myself and gained almost 10 lbs.
I’m back to keeping a food diary. I am weighing myself daily again. I’m making more appropriate decisions about what I eat and drink.
I may have to give up beer. It’s a weakness for me, and I often go to a wonderful food establishment just for the beer. Then, of course, I partake of the food also. I really wanted to go again today. I didn’t. I stayed home and ate sensibly. If that particular establishment is off-limits to me, and I quit drinking beer, it would be easier to stay on track.
In addition to work today, I had a number of errands to run. My route took me these places:
Home
Post Office
Coffee Shop
Bank
Work
Doctor’s Office
Coffee Shop
Home
It turned out to be 43.5 miles in beautiful weather. I had to spend a few hours working, and some time getting poked and prodded by my doctor, but overall a good day.
As far as my crushing depression I was having before… It disappeared <poof!> last Thursday. I did discuss it with my doctor, but I really don’t want to take medication for it. As far as an existing medication causing it, I should get the lab results soon.
Oh, I weighed this morning. I’ve gained weight, as expected. My weight this morning was 211.2, which is about where I was in early February. So, I lost some progress again. I’m back on the wagon.
After my post on Thursday, my mood lifted dramatically. I had ridden to work, then rode home later. I rode a partial commute on Friday. I managed to get over 40 miles in on Saturday also.
I talked to Michael about riding with him in the Bloomington area. He was happy to host a ride. We did about 63 miles over some nice terrain. It was hilly enough to keep it interesting, but not so hilly as to totally kill me.
I want to thank Michael for hosting the great ride and planning the route. I’d like to thank his wife for feeding us lunch. So, thanks!
I didn’t get very many good pictures, but I’ve posted a few of what I have below.
Although I didn’t ride today, Memorial Day, I had plenty of other activities to keep my busy. My mood has brightened greatly since early last week.
You’ve got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you’re not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice.
~Steven D. Woodhull
I did manage to get my butt out of bed early enough to ride to work today. I feel much better. I just need to keep doing it.
I want to thank everyone for the positive comments on the last post. Things have been rough, but it’s possible my depression is due to a medication I take. I’ll be talking to my doctor about it soon.
Motivation to do much of anything has been hard to come by. I haven’t ridden to work yet this week, or last week. I did go to work, but I drove, and even that was a challenge to push myself out the door.
I had intended to ride today. The weather has been beautiful.
I hate writing negative posts, but I figured I write this one rather than write nothing at all.
I’ve been suffering from a bout of depression for several months. It’s been a recurring problem in my life, but I thought I had it beat about three years ago. I was wrong.
More recently, some not-so-pleasant things have happened in my life that further add to the depression. What has this led to?
I’m pretty sure my weight is up. I haven’t actually weighed myself.
My eating was out of control until this past weekend. I have pulled it back together.
I’ve fallen behind on many things I need to do at work and around the house.
I’m not riding the bike enough. This week was Ride Your Bike to Work Week, yet I did not ride to work a single day this week. Then again, I was only at work for three days due to my Washington DC trip.
The only real positive thing is that I have been successfully fighting off the urges to overeat. I’ve been craving pizza and beer, but I’m cooking at home and leaving beer out of it.
I did visit a bike shop on Saturday, but I was just looking around. I have done some walking. ”Playing pedestrian” is a nice change of pace.
Kristy and I drove the rental car from Herndon to DC and back yesterday. Parking in DC itself is crazy. I would have rather been on a bike.
After eating entirely too much on Saturday and hating myself for it, I ate better yesterday. It’s still early today, but I’m determined to get my eating back under control, whether or not I’m traveling. I haven’t weighed myself since April 1st, and I’m a little scared to step on a scale again. I will weigh myself on June 1st, but not before.
That said, I am enjoying playing tourist and spending time with my wife. I fly out tomorrow morning, and will spending some time at the Detroit airport. If I can avoid some of the food, and concentrate on just getting home, that will help.
Weight is just a number. The number means something different to everyone.
I’ve been fixated on two numbers. 200 and 175. 175 lbs is my goal weight. 200 is the barrier that I’ve been trying hard to get below and stay below. So far I have failed both of these numbers.
What do I owe to these numbers? Why do I obsess over them? Numbers are hard facts, even if they aren’t the right facts.
I haven’t weighed myself since April 1st. I’ve been trying not to obsess. I have been overeating, and have probably gained a little weight. I’ve also been putting quite a few miles on the bike. Maybe it will balance out, maybe not.
I will start weighing myself again, but not yet. Maybe in June.
I haven’t been posting much recently, but life has been busy, and I’ve got a few things to post about.
Weight and Diet
I haven’t been tracking my eating or weight since I got back from DC. I’m trying to concentrate less on that, and spend more time enjoying life. Practicing moderation is still hard for me.
Riding
I’m still riding a fair amount. I went on a 50-mile mixed-terrain ride with Tim on Sunday. It was a beautiful day in a beautiful area. See a few pictures below. Also check out Tim’s post with pictures. Yes, there was a stream crossing. Yes, there was an off-road section. Yes, we were both riding LHTs.
I didn’t ride to work on Monday, but I did ride on Tuesday. My wife picked me up from work on Tuesday, so my mileage isn’t quite where it should be.
Encounters
While I was standing outside work waiting for my wife to pick me up yesterday, Adam approached me about my Surly LHT. He apparently has been, or still is, bicycle touring across the U.S. I didn’t have enough time to find out the details, but we talked bikes for a few minutes. He’s touring with Dwight, and they are documenting their travels online. It seems they haven’t updated the blog since last month though.
Vacation
My wife and I are leaving today for a vacation in the mountains of North Carolina. We’ll be bringing bicycles, but that’s not really the point of the vacation. With luck I won’t have cell reception. :)
My daughter will stay home to take care of the dogs and go to school, so this should be a really low-stress vacation. I’m looking forward to it.
Mental
When I initially lost a lot of weight it gave me a huge sense of accomplishment. Unfortunately, that fades over time. I’ve been fighting with depression again. I’m not sure of the best way to deal with it. I’m not a believer in medicating for it. Writing about what I’ve done and where I’m heading is probably the best tool I have to keep the depression at bay. I do have to say that today is much better than yesterday.
This past week has brought a lot of changes. Some of them positive, some of them not.
Diet
I believe the paleodiet works. I think it could work for me. However, it’s a trial and error process to get there. Since I started the paleodiet I’ve been suffering depression and lack of energy. I’ve also had dizzy spells. I don’t have the drive to figure out how to adjust the diet, so I’m switching back to my previous diet. I need to watch what I eat. I used to track calories, but I’m not going to this time, unless I start gaining weight again.
My new-old diet has helped me feel better, mostly. My energy level shot back up quickly. The depression is fading, but not quite gone. I’m still having minor dizzy spells.
Biking and Travel
I’m writing this from a hotel room outside of Washington DC. My wife is here for work, and I drove to meet her. I’ll be heading home in a few hours.
I brought Nermal with me to ride around DC. I’m glad I did, but I’ve had some mechanical problems with the bike, and may be retiring it soon. Kristy joked that I should have a “funeral” for the bike, and make an ID card identifying the bike as a “parts donor”.
I rode just over 30 miles on Friday, and did some sight seeing around the capital. It’s Cherry Blossom time, and a beautiful spring day, so the crowds were out in force.
On Saturday, I only rode about 10.5 miles, because I turned back due to the mechanical issues I mentioned. I didn’t want to walk back to the hotel. I spent most of that ride in Alexandria.
I have to admit that the Mt. Vernon trail is rather nice. It was heavily used while I was out. There were many cyclists, runners, walkers, and what not. I saw three trike riders. I stopped and talked to Michael riding a Greenspeed X5. He was kind enough to let me take it for a short spin. Now I have another item to add to my wish list. :)
I’m a bit underwhelmed by the “bike friendliness” of the area. Although the trail was nice, getting off the trail and unto a major artery in Alexandria was met with much honking, yelling, and even the flashing of a badge. I later looked it up, and I was allowed in the road.
In the part of DC itself that I rode in there weren’t actual bike trails, but simply wide sidewalks that were also used as bike paths. This was not ideal, especially with the crowds. In fairness, it was faster than attempting to ride in the streets, where traffic was mostly stationary. I also managed to fall over while coming to a stop in front of hundreds of people. That was embarrassing.
There is a bike/pedestrian path along the Woodrow Wilson Memorial Bridge. This path makes it possible to easily ride from Alexandria VA over to Prince George’s County MD. I wasn’t able to find any good bike riding on the Maryland side. There were a lot of riders going back and forth across the bride, many of them with children.
Bicycle Indecision
I’ve put a lot of miles on the new Surly LHT I bought in January. I’m still having comfort issues with it. I’ve ordered a new stem from Bluegrass Bicycle to raise the handlebars (I’ll be picking it up on Monday). I’m hoping that it will help. I rode the recumbent to work on Wednesday, and had forgotten just how comfortable it can be. I can ride many miles on the Surly, but do I want to? I can climb steeper hills with the Surly, but I can climb most hills on the ‘bent, and walk the ones I can’t ride up. I won’t be buying another upright bike until I’ve made up my mind about this. Poor Nermal (the cheap hybrid that is now broke) will not be replaced.
Bicycle Commuting
Kristy will be home on Monday also. I’ve ridden a lot of miles while she was gone. I can’t let that stop. I love the way riding makes me feel. It isn’t even just about weight loss anymore. It’s a combination of things.
Weight loss
Save money on parking and gas
More freedom from car issues
Sense of accomplishment
Endorphins!
I get cranky when I don’t ride, so to be a better husband and father, I must ride often!
Weight
My weight had dipped when I started the paleodiet. It’s now gone up a little, but seems to be holding steady now. I haven’t been weighing as often. I’ve actually quit focusing on weight as much as I used to.
I’m trying to find a healthy balance in my life for everything. I tend to obsess over things, so I’m taking a temporary hiatus from weighing myself.
Video
I shot the following video of a plane coming in for a landing at Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport. There is a park along the Mt. Vernon Trail with great views of the planes.
I rode my bike to work every day this week, except on Thursday. I feel good about that, but haven’t been feeling good in general. More on that later.
$30 worth of rubber, wasted
Monday I rode the long way to work. A beautiful route through Utica with lower traffic volume than the normal route. The ride home was cut short by a large nail, and I called a friend for a ride.
Tuesday, I took a wandering route that was longer than my standard commute, but not as long as the Utica route.
Wednesday was the full Utica route, without a tire failure this time. I’m really enjoying the longer days than we had a few months ago.
Thursday I didn’t ride to work, but I did ride a few miles to get pizza and beer.
Today, Friday, I took the direct route to work and back. It was cold and windy this morning, and slightly less cold and windy this afternoon. I throughly enjoyed the ride to work, but the ride home was a slog.
I’m not planning on riding tomorrow, as I’ve got a lot of other things going on, but I am planning a 55-60 mile RCCS ride on Sunday.
That will push me pretty close to 200 miles for the week.
Weight and Diet
My weight is fluctuating around 200 lbs again. My eating habits aren’t where they should be. I’m drinking a beer as I write this. I’m seriously considering giving up beer for good.
My paleo-diet idea is currently just that, an idea. I’ve been consuming pizza, brownies, ice cream, beer, chips, and other things that I shouldn’t. I think I need to reformulate the how and why I eat. I can better change my behavior if I understand it.
Mood
This has been a rough week. I’ll write a seperate post about it when I can put it into words that don’t come out sounding whiny. I went too long without updating here because I didn’t want to post something that basically means “Whaaaaaaaaaaaa!”.
I’ve been busy. Some of it was necessary, some of it was fun. I’ve been riding, but not quite enough. I’ve been following my paleodiet a bit better. I’ve been losing weight.
The RCCS had a another coffee ride last Sunday. It was a lot of fun. Due to scheduling issues, we didn’t have one today.
Tim got a new bike. It’s a Kona Ute, a cargo bike. I have no real need for a cargo bike. If I get a trailer, I’ll have even less need for a cargo bike, but I really like his Ute.
My Daughter's Nook
My daughter got a Nook. I got studded tires for my bike. Winter still won’t go away.
A shifter on my new LHT broke. On Your Left Cycles has ordered a new one for me, and fixed up the existing one well enough to have most of my gears.
I’ve order some slightly wider tires for my LHT. I should have them by Wednesday. There as wide as I dare go for enough clearance between tire and fender. (42-622 Continental Contact).
I’ve been under a fair amount of stress. I’m trying to teach my daughter to drive, but her attitude has made that difficult.
The stress makes me want to eat poorly. I’ve been doing pretty good at avoiding that for the most part.
With my weight hovering right around 200 I’m trying to push it under that 200 lb mark. I know that’s just an arbitrary number with no real meaning, but it does have a psychological meaning to me. My goal weight of 175 is also just another arbitrary number.
